crazy little mind of HL

Pambansang Kamao: Manny "Pacman" Pacquiao

2009-05-04T19:46:00.003+08:00

Photo from Getty Images

Manny Pacquiao did it again. I don't think there was a time in my generation like this moment that made me proud to be a Filipino. Pacman is the ultimate icon of who a Filipino should be. Hard-working, smart, strong, and humble. These are the qualities that our Pambansang Kamao teach our generation. More power to you Pacman, and may you continue to fight and fight till the end.

old couple watching the sunset.

2009-02-05T19:30:00.002+08:00

NOTE: This is something I wrote 4 years ago. something that have been going on in my mind a lot.

"i just don't know what to do with myself... fifty-five years together, its not easy."

i remember before, just before, we would always go down the beach and walk there every afternoon. it became a habit for us, those last precious days.

we'd just walk, and be silent. there's just weren't enough things to say, so you just stay quiet. you learn that after being with the person for so long.

one day, at the end of our walk, we saw this huge rock. it has a flat top. the wonderful thing about it was that it has this stairlike carvings along its side.

she lead me to that rock. we climbed it together. being the gentleman i let her climb it first. what i remember the most was that i was holding her right hand from behind, and then her left hand was holding on to the rock for balance. and as i look at that hand i saw her ring, the ring i gave her on our wedding day. and something inside me just stirred. i don't know what it was, just a feeling that is so peaceful.

then we sat on that rock, with our feet dangling along the edge my arm aroung her shoulders, like some teenagers on the first date. but it wasn't, its supposed to be the last.

we were facing the horizon, and the sun was setting. we just sat there, and watch the sun as it sinks down minute by minute through the horizon. i can't help thinking i was supposed to be the one sinking to oblivion, with the knowledge that i have. but i wasn't.

so we sat there, not talking, just breathing, and feeling the air. listening to the waves crashing on the shore, to the birds flapping their wings and cooing with the wind. then i looked at her, just looked at her.

when the sun was finally beyond the horizon, and darkness was all around, she turned to me and asked me if i saw it. i know she wasn't talking about the sun, but i told her, "yes i saw it, and it was beautiful."

Titanic after 10 years

2009-01-11T20:52:00.003+08:00

Star Movies have just aired Titanic, again.

After years, I watched that damn movie again. I feel so chagrined about it now. The first time I saw the movie was a little over ten years ago. The only driving force for me to watch the movie back then was because of Leonardo DiCaprio and that I was such a history buff, I wanted to see a movie about how the unsinkable ship went down to the middle of the Atlantic sea.

I remember there was such a hype about the biggest budgeted movie of all time. Now, I think it was all marketing to sell the movie, and at least to break even the $200M cost of making the movie. But whatever it was, it worked, it made the movie into the highest grossing movie of all time. The movie also launched Leo D. and Kate Winslet into stardom.

Having re-watched it again and in full (I've never really re-watched it since I saw it, ever). I just realized what I loved about the movie back then, and how it truly deserved the Oscar trophies. First, was the direction. James Cameron did not just do a lot of research, but also a lot of imagining as well. It's amazing how he was able to transfer those into film. He was so detailed in everything, it was so apparent during the last act of the film, when the ship was sinking. Second, was the screenplay. It was fluidly written, although the lines were cheesy and some of the plot lines were so cliche, everything just worked into telling this story of a girl meeting this boy, in a ship heading to its doom, and making the epic, tragic love story of all time. James Cameron also brought onto the screen what life was like at the start of the 20th century. Third, was the editing. I just love the way it was edited, the whole story just flows like a novel. Next, was the musical score. Although listening to My Heart Will Go On now is a bit chagrining, but the scoring was just right in setting the mood for each scene. The soundtrack did add to the feel of the period in the movie. Lastly was the production and special effects, one can't just beat how detailed everything was, down to the materials used, and recreating the grandest ship of its time.

I think Titanic changed the way movies were made and the way it should be made. Sure there are better movies, but Titanic's appeal was not just the tragic love story, it was greater than that. It's embarrassing to admit that it still made me teary eyed, not because of Jack died, but the sadness of it all, the human tragedy that it represented.

A few things I did notice this time though, aside from the cheesy lines, Leo's acting was really mediocre and Kate Winslet had a very high pitched voice. Plus I keep remembering the spoof in a radio program, the one with Kikoy and Kikay. It was funny because they have this Chipmunks' voice.

Exit Music (for a film)

2009-01-06T00:15:00.002+08:00

I loved this song for a long long long time! ever since I saw William Shakespeare's Romeo + Juliet. The song just about summarizes the whole story, accompanied by the haunting melody. But it wasn't included in the soundtrack album. I was so frustrated. I don't even know the title of the song. Coz I wasn't really a big radiohead fan, but I do like their music. And the www was not readily available back then. So now I feel so stupid, coz its just now that I started looking for this song thru the information highway. I should've done it a long time ago.

so i went to Youtube, and searched for a good video of this song. This one was live from Belfort in 1997.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2009-01-06T00:03:00.002+08:00

So its 2009. I don't want to make another resolution, I don't want to be bothered to make one.

But it was a good 2008.

I traveled twice this year, I met friends I haven't seen in a long time.

I discovered, I'm not good at working for my uncle's company. For the second year, I quit another job.

I learned people are not what they seem. I've actually known that for a while, but it just hit me fully in the face this year.

I've gained new experiences, and lost some.

I turned 28, and I realized its a turning point. But it still bothers me that people think I'm 18.

Harry Potter was so over, and Twilight is so in.

Finally Love is still an elusive thing.

For 2009, I just need a new job. And probably a man.

Oh my I just suddenly realized, my birth date looks like this: 09/09/09 and its creepier than 10 years ago which was 09/09/99.

Twilight (movie)

2008-12-04T08:53:00.004+08:00

Twilight is the first movie that I watched multiple times in cinema theaters.

Obsessed that much? Not really.

It's mostly because all of my friends are also into Twilight. Since I have different sets of friends (office mates, college buddies, forum friends, my best friends), so I get to see the movie with each of them. It was fine, except that I only have one weekend to watch it with all of them. It was pretty tiring watching the movie 3 times in one weekend.

I did enjoy the movie, I know there's a 'but' somewhere there. It was different from the book, but that's expected, not one director nor scriptwriter can really make a film exactly as the book. It's an adaptation, so there will always be differences and changes.

In this movie there was a lot of changes and differences, but all in all the movie stayed true to the book. The essence of the story was still there, although the director did focus a lot on the cinematic effects, trying to make the film more 'visually dynamic.' The key word here is 'trying,' it would have been better if they made it simpler. They should've directed the lead actors to act their characters' emotions for them to connect to the audience, just like the book did with its readers, that kind of effect would have been better.

The actors were good, especially Robert Pattinson. I think he's the best actor to play Edward. He nailed Edward like it's nobody's business. However, I do have some issues with Bella in the movie. Kristen Stewart's portrayal was too edgy and tough, and a bit angsty. There were times also when she just seem to be flat, her acting was monotonous and bland. She has also this habit of eye twitching, which was kind of annoying.

I hope she gets to improve her acting of Bella in the sequel, because Bella will be doing a lot of crying in the second installment. That's what she was lacking in the movie, she hardly shed a tear, its like what the freak, Bella cries, and mostly its about Edward. She is weak in that way, her only weakness and her only strength is her love for Edward. She also needs to work on looking in love, coz at times it doesn't come across. There were looks of lust, but very few looks of love, only towards the end, during the prom scene.

I think the movie would have been better, if the director knows what she's doing, and not looking like lets-experiment-with-making-a-movie-and-lets-call-it-twilight. More than the movie, I was expecting more of the director and the actors. It was quite a surprise that Edward was the one who carried the whole movie, instead of Bella. If it wasn't for Pattinson's brilliant performance, the movie would have been a major flop and disappointment among fans.

music wish list

2008-11-28T21:23:00.003+08:00

These past few weeks I kinda sorta reconnected with the music lover inside of me. Ever since that night I discovered about Little Joy, I kinda looked back to the kinds of music I like to listen to. I discovered that I haven't really checked out the works of some of the artists whose one or two songs I felt connected. So for the next few days or weeks or months, I will be checking out theses artists that I have found, and happen to appreciate:

Nick Cave (and the Bad Seeds)
Iron & Wine
Tom Waits
Radiohead
Rolling Stones - i need to check out this band, i heard they were great! hehe
Kings of Leon

Little Joy

2008-11-24T12:06:00.004+08:00

One night I can't sleep, and it was almost midnight, so I got my Creative Zen, and instead of listening to my usual playlist, I tuned into FM radio (one of the reasons why I bought the Zen instead of iPod). I was scanning for stations, when I happened to stop at this station playing some indie rock music. So I stopped my scanning and listened to the song that was playing. I was lying on my bed, thinking, who is this playing? I haven't heard anything like it before. It kind of reminded me of songs from the 50s rock, but quite different and until now I still can't figure out what's different about it.

So when the one song ended, I was waiting for a DJ to announce the title of the song and the artist. But to my surprise another song came on, with the same vocals as the previous one. I was drawn into listening more. I was loving it. I keep on thinking who is this band?

I don't know how long was it, but before the DJ even say anything, I kind of figured that they are playing all the songs of that band. RJ freaking Underground (that's the name of the station, didn't even know it exists ha!) played the entire album!

Even though I was sleepy, I stored in my head the name of the artist, only one name was mentioned by the DJ (I wasn't really sure, coz my head was kind of in a haze). It's Fabrizio Moretti, the drummer for the band Strokes (and I have no idea who the Strokes is). And the DJ went on how he was the ex-boyfriend of Drew Barrymore. The title of the album is Little Joy.

So I did a little search in YouTube (this site is becoming my fave haha). A little search and I found out more about them, as well as listen to their songs that was uploaded.

It turned out the album's name was also the name of the band, Little Joy. The new band was composed of three people: Fabrizio Moretti (from the Strokes), Rodrigo Amarante (from Los Hermanos, a brazilian band), and Bikini Shapiro (Moretti's girlfriend). According to news the Strokes is currently in hiatus and that members are doing some side jobs. I'm still trying to figure out who they are as of this moment. But for now, I love this album. It's the first time in a long while that I felt something like this for an album or a band. I just knew that I need to have it asap!

Here's a sample of their music:

Keep In Mind

With Strangers (this is my favorite)

november 2008

2008-11-17T18:16:00.002+08:00

wow! its been over a year! and i haven't updated this blog with anything!

i have been obsessed with work for the past year, and now i can at least log in and write a few sentences in my blog.

and right now, I'm so obsessed with Twilight!

gosh, at first it was really difficult for me to read. it was like reading a fanfic.
but then i got caught up with the love story, and it was just epic.

now i can't wait for the movie! looking forward to see it on the big screen, and i like the cast, especially the two leads, robert pattinson and kristen stewart. they went deep with their characters and based from the previews and trailers that has been around the net, they did great!

so i'll probably be posting stuff every now and then, coz i have nothing to do these days.

November

2007-11-11T11:57:00.000+08:00

i was supposed to update this blog with three entries:

first, about the 12-peso wage hike increase, and the unfairness of it;
second, when we went to Batangas for the funeral of my mom's cousin and meeting my grandfather after years of not seeing him;
and third, about my korean friends

but i received an email reagarding the news story of a young girl's suicide:

Girl who killed self lamented family’s poverty in diary
By Nico AlconabaInquirerLast updated 10:00pm (Mla time) 11/07/2007
Most Read
DAVAO CITY, Philippines -- A 12-year-old girl, who became despondent over her family’s poverty, hanged herself inside their makeshift house a day after her father told her he could not give her the P100 she needed for a school project.
Using a thin nylon rope, 12-year-old Mariannet Amper hanged herself in the afternoon of November 2. She was a sixth grader at the Maa Central Elementary School .
Her father, Isabelo, 49, who was out of job as a construction worker, said Mariannet asked him for P100 which she needed for school projects, on the night of November 1. He told his daughter that he did not have the money yet but he would ask his wife if she could get some money for her. The morning after, however, he was able to get a P1,000 cash advance for a construction work on a downtown chapel.
By the time he got home, Mariannet already lay dead.
"Duda nako nga tungod ni sa kalisod namo (I suspect that she did it because of our situation)," Isabelo said.
Going through Mariannet's things, her parents saw her school "talaarawan" or diary.
In her October 5 entry, Mariannet wrote: "Parang isang buwan na kaming absent. Hindi na kasi nakin (sic) binibilang ang absent ko. Hindi ko namalayan na malapit na pala ang Pasko." [It feels as if we’ve been absent for a month. They’re not counting my absences anymore. I just realized that Christmas is just around the corner.]
Isabelo recalled that in that week, Mariannet skipped school as they did not have money for her food and transportation allowance.
"We did not have any money and I didn't want Mariannet and her younger brother (Reynald) to walk to school," he said in Bisaya.
But Isabelo clarified that Mariannet was absent for only three days. "For her, three days was like one month," he said.
On October 14, Mariannet wrote in her diary: "Hindi kami nakapagsimba dahil wala kaming pamasahe at nilalagnat pa ang aking tatay kaya nanglaba na lang kami ng aking nanay." [We were not able to hear mass because we did not have fare money and my dad was sick with fever. So, my mom and I just washed clothes.]
Along with her diary, the Ampers also discovered a letter Mariannet wrote for the GMA 7 television program "Wish Ko Lang [I just Wish]."
"Gusto ko po sana magkaroon ng bagong sapatos at bag at hanapbuhay para sa nanay at tatay ko. Wala kasing hanapbuhay ang tatay at nagpa-extra extra lamang ang aking nanay sa paglalaba," she said in her "Wish Ko Lang" letter. [I wish for new shoes, a bag and jobs for my mother and father. My dad does not have a job and my mom just gets laundry jobs.]
"Gusto ko na makatapos ako sa pag-aaral at gustong-gusto ko na makabili ng bagong bike," she added. [I would like to finish my schooling and I would like very much to buy a new bike.]
That letter, apparently written while Mariannet was still 11 years old, was never sent to "Wish Ko Lang."
"We never knew that our daughter had dreams for us," Isabelo said.
Isabelo's wife, Magdalena , works part-time "repacking" odong and misua in a nearby factory, earning at least P50 a day. She also does laundry jobs on the side, receiving P100 to P150.
Isabelo, on the other hand, is in and out of work.
"I'm already old, no one would want to hire me," he said.
The Ampers live in a hillside community at the back of the Yñiguez Subdivision in Maa District. They do not have electricity and water supply.
Of the seven children, only Mariannet and Reynald are left with their parents as most are grown up and have families of their own.
Even with only two children left to feed, the Ampers still have a hard time surviving.
A neighbor said that even in this "mostly poor" neighborhood, the Ampers were being discriminated against.
"Ayaw makipaglaro ng ibang bata sa kanila dahil madudungis daw sila," the neighbor said. [The other kids do not want to play with them because they’re dirty.]
"Mahirap na nga sila, ni-reject pa ng ibang kapitbahay," she added. [They’re poor and they’re rejected by their neighbors.]

Copyright 2007 Inquirer. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

‘We are all to blame for poor girl’s suicide’--bishop
By Beverly T. NatividadInquirerLast updated 08:34pm (Mla time) 11/07/2007
MANILA, Philippines -- Not only the government, but somehow, all of us, are to blame for the fate of a 12-year-old girl in Davao City who took her own life because of her family’s poverty.
This was the moral lesson conveyed by some of the country’s religious leaders in the wake of Marianette Amper’s suicide last Friday.
Lingayen-Dagupan Archbishop Oscar V. Cruz said it was the “summit of desperation” for a young child to end her own life out of hunger and poverty. He said the incident showed the desperation of many Filipinos.
While suicide does not particularly go well with Roman Catholic Church teaching, Cruz said he would be the last person to blame the child for taking her own life.
He said the community, which directly influenced the young girl, should be looked into. Her death, said Cruz, was brought about by her social surroundings.
He said everyone is also to blame for her death. If one girl goes hungry due to poverty, then the entire society is responsible for it, Cruz said.
“This means we have not done well. We have not done our civic duty to correct the abuses, and to censure graft and corruption. We have kept our eyes closed. We did not act,” he said.
The National Council of Churches in the Philippines (NCCP), which represents the mainline Protestants in the country, echoed the same view, saying the death the girl represents the failure of society as a whole.
“We have called them poor and eyesores, but what do you call a society which made them like this?” said Bishop Eliezer Pascua of the NCCP executive committee.
On the moral aspect, Jesus has always asked the people to identify with the poor, according to Pascua.
The essence of Jesus’ teachings is to fight poverty because Jesus has always talked about the poor as an act of critiquing the present order which has contributed to the poverty, he said.
“Every individual has a responsibility, yes, but we also have a calling for a collective responsibility,” said Pascua.
That calling asks all the faithful not only to take part actively to build a just and fair society, but also to fight an unjust and an oppressive society, according to the NCCP official.
The Philippines for Jesus Movement (PJM), for its part, said the government, too, should take responsibility for the sad event. Poverty and hunger, which was the reason for the young girl’s suicide, could be traced directly to corruption, it said.
The Bible says that governments should be “terrors against evil” and “promoters of goodwill,” said Bishop Dan Balais, PJM national director.
Governments therefore exist to take care of the poor and the weak. But politicians have corrupted the meaning of government, Balais said.
“The death of the girl is the result of our problems of corruption, injustice and oppression. There have been many wake-up calls that have remained unheeded,” he said.

Copyright 2007 Inquirer. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

i wonder if our unjust society would do something to prevent this from happening again, or as this unjust society would often do, turn a blind eye on it, and let it be just another sad news.

we often see on the news about people climbing billboards or buildings or electric structures, and most of the time their problems were poverty related. those news were already a warning of the great problem that the GREATER of the Filipino people are suffering from, if the MINORITY of the Filipino people have acted only sooner, as they have the sole power of CONTROL over this impoversished land, then the death of one girl could have been prevented.

power can be used for good and evil, however the evil ones are the most hungry for it and not afraid to use it.

i don't want to say this but i do think that this young girl wouldn't be the last to take her own life because of poverty, as long as our society is corrupted and unjust, then this cycle wouldn't end.

7th May

2007-05-07T14:57:00.000+08:00

haven't put something in this blog for quite a while.

well i was busy, then was not in the mood, then i was busy, then not in the mood again.

anyhow... so here i am, writing in my blog again.

so what did put me in a mood to write something... it's this:

NOTE: Frank Spotnitz has confirmed on his official blog that TXF2 is in the works.

i had a chat with a friend, and we talked about my favorite show, the x-files. i didn't know she's also a fan. so i got inspired into visiting some sites that i haven't visited, that includes GA's official website. i backlogged on her site's news archive and there were some news article posted about GA and DD working together again to film XF2. I'm just so happy about it. it's been like forever, well 5 years, since the talk of XF2 started, and finally its going to happen. i'm excited to see mulder and scully again on the big screen, i've missed them so much.

here's the article that was posted in GA's official website:

Mulder, Scully to return in new 'X-Files' film
April 16, 2007By Cindy Pearlman Chicago Sun-Times

X will mark the spot at the box office again. David Duchovny just told GLARE that a new "X Files" film is "definitely in the works."

"Mulder and Scully will be up on the big screen one more time, and I'm looking forward to it," he says. "I really miss the people behind 'The X Files.' This film will be a reunion, and I think we'll make a great movie because Mulder and Scully are just great characters."

As for the plot, Duchovny says, "It's five years later. It will be a stand-alone movie. You have to assume a lot of people don't know the show, so you need a plot that doesn't require that you've seen the TV series."

The first "X Files" movie debuted in 1998. Is it too long a wait for another film?

"I think there were two schools of thought: Do another one right away or wait and have the fans really want one. I like the idea of people saying, 'Hey, where is Mulder after all of these years? Is he following Jimmy Buffett? Did he become a Parrothead?' " jokes the actor.

Duchovny says it will "probably be easy to step back into Mulder's suit. ... It's like 'The Incredibles.' The suit is hanging in my closet, waiting. I'm just hoping to fit into the suit. I don't want to hear, 'Oh, man. Mulder has to cut back on the carbs.' "

Forget any old stories about angst with his co-star, played by Gillian Anderson, who plays Scully. "We love each other now," he says. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder. We actually had lunch last week, and it was really nice to be back together."

The film is expected to debut next summer. Duchovny says the script is "shrouded in secrecy. It's even a secret from me at the moment. I'd blab if I could."

then GA wrote something, more of like a blog entry, concerning mis-understanding about her comments on working in the show and her relationship with DD. i kind of understand why she's frustrated at inaccurate reports with regards to her working on the show and with DD, theirs is a relationship that's complicated and hard to explain, and different people would interpret what she said or done in different perspectives. but i do like what she said in her article, she's being honest and straight to the point. here's an excerpt:

Did I hate it? At times yes.

Did I love it? At times yes.

Did I regret it or do I regret it now? Not for a second.

Did David and I hate each other? At times yes like any brother and sister, husband and wife, co-worker and co-worker forced to spend that much time together under such strenuous circumstances.

Do we hate each other now? Not in the least.

Do I imagine that when we do the film together we won't hate each other for a few hours during the filming? No. We will. Vehemently. As David waits patiently, again and again for the hair dryer to calm my frizzy hair between takes so it matches the beginning of the scene... he will undoubtedly be thinking "what the hell was I thinking agreeing to shoot with her f****** frizzy hair again?"

But we will also love each other and laugh with each other and pull pranks on each other and bug each other like we did for nine years.

내사람 by SG Wannabe

2007-02-09T14:48:00.000+08:00

This song is currently a favorite of mine... just coz...

내사람 by SG Wannabe

내 가슴속에 사는 사람 내가 그토록 아끼는 사람
너무 소중해 마음껏 안아보지도 못했던
누구에게나 흔한 행복 한번도 준적이 없어서
맘 놓고 웃어본적도 없는 그댈 사랑합니다

내가 기쁠때나 슬플때나 함께 울고 웃어주던
그댈 위해 내가 할 수 있는건 뭐든 해주고 싶어

안녕 내사랑 그대여 이젠 내가 지켜줄게요
못난 날 믿고 참고 기다려줘서 고마워요
안녕 내사랑 그대여 영원토록 사랑할게요
다시 태어나서 사랑한대도 그대이고 싶어요

어두운 밤 길을 잃어도 서로 등불이 되어주고
비바람 몰아쳐도 지금 잡은 두손 놓지 말아요
내가 힘들때나 아플때나 내 곁에 있어준 그대
미안하단 말로 고맙단 말을 대신 하던 나였죠

안녕 내사랑 그대여 이젠 내가 지켜줄게요
못난 날 믿고 참고 기다려줘서 고마워요
안녕 내사랑 그대여 영원토록 사랑할게요
다시 태어나서 사랑한대도 그대이고 싶어요

넘어지고 몇 번을 다시 넘어진다 해도
그대만 있다면 다시 일어날 수 있는데

안녕 내 사랑 그대여 이젠 내가 지켜줄게요
못난 날 믿고 참고 기다려줘서 고마워요
안녕 내사랑 그대여 이렇게 그댈 부를때면
너무 행복해서 눈물이 나죠 사랑해요

My Person
translation by: Jungie (also credit: aheeyah.com)
You're the person living in my heart
and the person that I've treasured so.
Because you were so special I couldn't hold you
because I had never given anyone happiness before
I love you who's never laughed at ease.
When I was happy or sad you cried and laughed with me
and I want to do anything I can for you.
Hello my love, my love I'll protect you now.
Thank you for putting up with me and waiting for me.
Hello my love, my love I'll love you forever.
When I'm born again I want you to be the one I love.
Let's be a lamp to each when we've lost our way in the dark night.
Even if the rain wind drives us back,
don't let go of these two hands holding you now.
You were always by my side when I was worn and pained.
I had used "I'm sorry" in place of "thank you".
Hello my love, my love I'll protect you now.
Thank you for putting up with me and waiting for me.
Hello my love, my love I'll love you forever.
When I'm born again I want you to be the one I love.
Even if I fall down and fall down again and again,
if I have you then I know I can stand back up again.
Hello my love, my love I'll protect you now.
Thank you for putting up with me and waiting for me.
Hello my love, my love when I call you like this
I'm so happy I could cry, I love you.

new year

2007-01-22T17:18:00.000+08:00

haven't posted in a long time... not because i was busy... i was just lazy... hehehe

so what's new this 2007...

i got a new tagboard from cbox, hopefully it will not be flooded by spam like the previous tagboard

then i also got a new counter, so its back to 0 again

as to love life, no its still 0 hehehe

what else... oh i got a new mobile phone, well it it was my mom's old phone (she's using this 3G nokia thing) she gave it to me after my new phone was stolen just before new year's while shopping at a department store... grrr... really hate that person who picked-pocket from my bag... i really don't care whether i got the phone back or not, i just wanted my old sim card back... it was my first sim card, just sentimental value i guess...

oh and i got this cyworld thing... its really cool... i've been posting pics there like crazy hehe

here's the link to my cyworld: http://us.cyworld.com/myornampyong

i got no new year's resolution, but i have a new year's wish... world peace kekekeke

2006-11-21T11:34:00.000+08:00

my mind is blank... actually no, its filled with images and thoughts of a certain Korean guy... aahhh i wish i'm in korea so i could see him...

just gained 3Kg

2006-10-17T09:19:00.000+08:00

I weighed myself last night, and found that I gained 3Kg! Which is great, coz I've been wanting forever to gain weight, now I've reached my ideal body weight, so my next goal is to gain another 3Kg. I was aiming to gain 5 Kg more, but then I would really be overweight, which means changing my wardrobe, which is kinda expensive! hehehe... but still I'm happy about this weight gain. until I gain 3Kg more, FIGHTING!!!

Book Tag

2006-09-14T09:33:00.000+08:00

From Mia:
1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your blog along with these instructions.
5. Don’t you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.
6. Tag three people.

"She went off to the loo. I could hear her weeing. It sounded like a carthorse." - Further Confessions of Georgia Nicholson: It's OK, I'm wearing really big knickers

Goong Bears in Paris

2006-08-16T17:19:00.000+08:00

In relation to my current addiction

2006-08-03T12:45:00.000+08:00

Alfred Bears (mini)

대한민국 왕세자 - 왕세자비 한 쌍

감미로운 키스...

Chaegyung addicted to Shin's back

bagong kinaaadikan

2006-07-20T10:07:00.000+08:00

'궁'

(Palace aka Princess Hours)

Lee Shin, 왕태자 (Crown Prince)

Shin Chae-gyung, 왕태자비 (Crown Princess)

태자 전하 에 비궁마마

untitled and unfinished

2006-05-24T13:24:00.000+08:00

The emptiness of the sky
like a purple orb in the distant horizon
weightless and floating like a balloon,
detached as a quill feather from a hen.

The indistinct feature of venus,
the ephemeral thunder of a blueless sky,
an ethereal dream of the lucid mind,
are the remains of a dreadful heart.

The broken arrow from cupid's bow
would it be his fault if it were so?
can he mend a broken arrow,
even if it has broken two hearts or more?

2006-05-01T12:42:00.000+08:00

Enough. Enough already.

Let go

2006-04-23T18:13:00.000+08:00

let go, let go
let go, now
not tomorrow, not later
now.
let go, let go
it wouldn't be the first time, certainly the last.

let go, let go
of the past, the present, and the future

let go, let go
of the kite flying happily, of its string; stop holding on, stop hoping to be carried away, that is lunacy and pain in the making.

accept and let go, let go
please it has to end somehow, sometime; this is the closure, this is the conclusion
accept and let go
but not with tears, not with heartache
let go with a smile and hope that this is the end.

2006-04-12T14:48:00.000+08:00

We must understand the politics of our community and we must know what politics is supposed to produce. We must know what part politics play in our lives. And until we become politically mature we will always be mislead, lead astray, or deceived or maneuvered into supporting someone politically who doesn’t have the good of our community at heart.

-- Malcolm X

This quote is so descriptive of the current political situation in the philippines. this country badly needed some political maturity, not just from government officials, especially the opposition, but also from the people who have the power to elect their preferred government leader. how can immature voters elect a good government official/leader? this country has been a loony bin ever since the infamous 1986 EDSA. ironic, isn't?

bagong crush, bagong standard

2006-03-20T17:37:00.000+08:00

Na-inlab ako nung isang lingo. hindi ko akalain na makikita ko ang pinakamagandang lalaki sa balat ng lupa. at ang pangalan nya ay Stefano. Isa siya sa aming mga kliyente. pero di namin siya nakasama kasi ibang study ang assignment niya. pero nasa isang floor lang kami ng linden suites. habang buhay ng nasa isipan ko ang hallway ng 18th floor ng linden suites sa ortigas, kung saan siya nag-yoyosi break, at syempre ako nakikiyosi break na rin, para lang masilayan siya. kahit sobrang nakakapagod ang project namin na yun, basta nandiyan siya bilang inspirasyon, ayos lang.

hindi ko nga nalaman kung ano ang kanyang apelyido o anong ahensiya siya nagtratrabaho, ang alam ko lang eh galing siya ng spain at sabi nila sa research international daw siya. kasi naman nung unang araw pa lang, nung general briefing ng lahat ng ahensiya, siya nakagad ang una kong napansin, at nung pinapakilala na siya, eh first name lang niya ang narinig ko, biglang nablanko ang isip ko. kahit nga pag dumadaan siya o nakaksalubong namin, natatahimik ako, parang na-star strcuk ba. parang high school ang pakiramdam ko nung isang linggo.

at ngayon lang ako naging stalker. dios mio! talaga naman inaabangan ang paglabas nya, baka sakaling makuhanan ko ng picture gamit ang camera phone ko. may nakuha naman ako, kaya lang side view lang nya. nahiya na kasi ako nung bandang huli, hindi kasi ako ganun talaga. nagbalak din ako kausapin na siya, kasi medyo mahiyain din siya, pero hindi na siya nagyosi break nung last day, siguro iniisip nya na stalker talaga nya ako! huhuhu...

at ngayon kahit malayo na siya, at wala nang pag-asa na makita ko ulit, nakakainis isipin na dahil sa kanya nagbago na ang aking standards pagdating sa mga lalaki. masyado nang mataas, walang pinoy siguro na makakatalo kay Stefano, di lang sa kagwapuhan pati na rin sa ugali. tama nga ang kaibigan ko na pumunta na lang kami sa europe, baka dun namin makita ang hinahanap namin lalaki. pag-iipunan ko talaga ang europe na yan!

choices

2006-03-09T15:05:00.000+08:00

i know i have choices, well maybe just two choices
i do have a choice to move to the other side
or to stay at this side, the west side of the blue pool.
i like the people from both sides, but the other side
seems to have an orderly fashion of doing business.
they never seem to have blank moments like i do,
their heads seems to appreciate their body as a pool
one can learn a great deal and classlessness is a rule.
i would've appreciated if somebody gives a damn
to correct mistakes or to say how it is done
but in a room full of new servants to the king,
well must all heed in unity unto his majesty's words.

2006-03-09T15:02:00.000+08:00

I MISS THE FREAKING X-FILES!!!

I WANT THE 2nd FREAKING MOVIE RIGHT NOW!!!

Cebu Trip

2006-02-28T12:16:00.000+08:00

It was raining when the plane landed on Mactan International Airport, and it was also raining when the plane took-off from the same airport to Davao International Airport. We weren't able to do a lot of sight seeing, especially the infamous beaches of Cebu. But we're slowly becoming bored of our hotel, so we decided to see some tourist spots that are not too far from the city of Cebu.

The first stop was the Magellan Cross and Sto. Niño Basilica and Museum. A trip to Cebu wouldn't be complete without seeing these historical monuments that defined the Filipino Culture for more than four hundred years. Magellan's cross did not just symbolize the Christianization of the natives of these islands in the Pacific, but it also symbolized the colonization of a country that we now call the Philippines.

It was Sunday when we went to the Sto. Niño Basilica, being good Christians we didn't attend the mass, but went to see the museum. There were so many people attending the mass, a proof that in this part of the world, there are still good Catholics attending Sunday mass. The church is like other old, baroque style churches that I've been to (like in Bicol, Lucban, etc) the only difference was the presence of the said wooden image of the Sto. Niño, that many devotees pay tribute to. The museum is just small, it contains a small amount of clothes that were made for the Sto. Niño, and was worn during the saint's feast day. There were also some jewelries that were gifts or offerings to the Sto. Niño. Then there are also some pieces of books, tunics worn by priests and other Catholic effects used for ceremonies and rites.

Something funny happened while I was in the museum. There was these group of people, two Filipinas and American mother and son. It was obvious that the two Filipina locals were sort of tourist guides for the Americans. I noticed that the American mother was so fascinated by the intricate designs of the clothes of the Sto. Niño. In between the glass casings of some artifacts, there was this wooden replica of a two-headed eagle. It was the eagle that was in the code of arms of a noble family in Germany, it says so in the card that bears the description just below its feet. One of the Filipinas, wanted to impress the American mother, pointed at it and said that "this is the Philippines monkey-eating eagle." I was so appalled by what she said, I was thinking and wanted to say 'you idiot, can't you read?' But the American mother looked at it and read the description and just said "oh" obviously not wanting to make their tour guide look stupid and be embarassed by her mistake. I never did hear the Filipina apologize. What an embarassment!

After seeing Magellan's Cross and the Sto. Niño Basilica, we went to Fort San Pedro. A legacy of Spain's military presence in the Philippines and also in Asia. At the top you can imagine what it was like then, you could see the beach and the sea from the top and it was really a good place to observe incoming ships, and know whether its a threat or not. Although I don't think that the top of it was populated by plants four hundred years ago, the landscape was beautiful and relaxing. We also noticed that its a popular dating place, especially the alcoves and nooks where the canyons were placed.

And the Cebu tour wouldn't be complete without buying the specialty of the province, which is dried danggit. So on our last day, we went to the uber market of dried danggit in Cebu city, where you can buy the cheapest danggits. One thing that's certainly part of the experience was when we get off the cab, the smell of dried fish filled our nostrils, and it was overwhelming, ang lansa! Then we noticed how many rows and rows of huge rattan baskets filled with mounds of dried fishes, from danggit, squids, labahita, etc. I was thankful that we went there on a weekday, I don't want to think what its like during weekends when there will be so many shoppers. By the time we left we smell like dried fish already, the odor clung to our clothes, even to my skin!

After shopping for dried danggits, we got a cab and contracted it to drive us to Tops, another tourist spot at the highest peak, overlooking the whole city of Cebu. I wanted to catch the sunset, but the drive was slow, and the sun has set when we got there, but I still got a few shots of the beautiful colors from the top. We spent a few minutes there, coz thats what we agreed with the cab driver, but it was beautiful indeed. The few number of people there also added the attraction.

So that was my trip to Cebu. It was my first time and it was a business trip, so I can't say that I enjoyed it, but it was a nice trip nonetheless. Hopefully next time, I got more time to explore the other stuff the island has to offer.

2006-02-24T20:11:00.000+08:00

I just got back from my trips to Cebu and Davao, and what does Metro Manila greeted me with declarations of state of emergency, coup plots, and people protests in the streets of Makati and along EDSA. Its my first day back in office after two weeks of doing field work, my ass barely warmed up my office chair, and our boss informed us to go home. There is fear that the rallies in EDSA and Ayala Ave might escalate into something violent. I do not like this at all. All these protests of ousting the current president, five years after ousting the previous president. Its becoming so tiresome and pathetic. Why don't these people go to another island and set up their own government there! What they are shouting in those streets are stupid! No wonder nobody's satisfied with any president after Marcos, its because poeple are so stupid! They allow themselves to be used for political gains of those who wants the chief position in the executive branch of government. They are also stupid for voting people in the government for a couple of hundred pesos. As I said before, if indeed the president is removed from the office, whether by force or not, who will then replace her? I'm sure nobody would be satisfied with the current vice-president to be the next chief executive. What's the next plan of the opposition if indeed they succeed to oust the president? Oust the constitutional successor, until the next constitutional successor to the president belongs to their party?

Why do I call those protesting stupid? Because what they are whining about is that they are not feeling the economic progress that the current president is boasting. Why? Because for them economy are the prices of the utilities they use, the prices of goods and services, and the rising cost of fuel oil! They don't care about the peso going strong against the dollar, the 2nd strongest currency is South East Asia last year! They don't care that the index of the Philippines Stock Exchange is at its highest points in years. All they care is where they would get the money to buy their food for the day! Doesn't that show how selfish and apathetic Filipinos are? Well I don't even want to call them Filipinos, coz they don't sure belong to the Philippines that wants to be economically stronger, democratic, and peaceful.

I probably should stop now, coz if I write more, then i would be writing a non-fiction on the current events in this goddamn country!

2006-01-25T12:44:00.000+08:00

I was reading some stuff about tweens and adolescense and sexuality... the author asked the questions how come ther are centers for abused young girls and women, our society teaches girls and women how to defend themselves from attacks such as rape and sexual molestation, we even have centers that caters to these ideals... but howcome society does not teach boys not be rapist or molesters, how come there aren't any center for men who abuse kids and women, why aren't society teaching boys to treat with respect, care and value the girls and women around them?

why indeed?

Pinoy Pride: Manny "Pacman" Paquiao

2006-01-23T13:07:00.000+08:00

Masayang-masaya ako at nanalo si Paquiao sa kanyang rematch kalaban si Erik Morales. Ang galing talaga ni Pacman, ganda ng depensa niya, lakas ng suntok nya, at sobrang fit na fit siya nung laban nila ni Morales. Pero hindi ko naman sinasabi na hindi magaling si Morales. Medyo naawa nga ako sa kanya nung na-knockout siya. Pero nawala lang talaga yung laban sa kanya nung nakita niya at naramdaman niya ang lakas ni Pacman. Natutuwa ako at talagang maipagmamalaki pa rin ng pinoy ang galing sa boxing. Kahit papaano andun pa rin sa pinoy ang palaban na attitude, na siya namang kailangan upang magtagumpay.

Congratulations to Team Paquiao! You make us all proud to be Filipino!

who's got the last laugh now

2006-01-20T15:01:00.000+08:00

I'm deliriously happy today, the 20th of January. because five years ago, i stood by the constitution of the Philippines and not joined the ousting of a legally elected, and not to mention with a landslide victory and very popular, president; and also not supported the induction of a new president, that is unconstitutional. mine is the last laugh (and also to those who saw that event as insignificant and illegal), because those who went to 'edsa dos' are eating (and hopefully choking too) what they have been shouting at what they call the rally of the 'masses' (when in fact the front on edsa shrine was packed with the 10% elite population who control the 90% resources of the country, and the social climber middle class, who enjoyed the presence of all the rich people and the celebrities that they think are not jologs).

now where are those people who were so proud in doing their 'duty to the nation'? i wonder where are they hiding? i wonder if they are now denying any involvement in the so called 'edsa dos.' well its no wonder they would deny it, traitors that they are, even to their own! and some of them even, like pontious pilate, washed their hands on the effect that they have caused not only to the political landscape but to the economy as well. i don't want to be so cruel, but they are not worth calling themselves as Filipinos, and if they are indeed Filipinos, then i cease to exist as a Filipino, because i don't want to be identified with them, traitors and pretentious bastards! The impeachment would have not thrown the legal president then, even if the envelope was opened, because what's inside the envelope would be proof that Erap is innocent of the charges against him, (i know this as true, even before ABS-CBN showed it in Rated K, because my greatuncle was demoted from the NBI when he found in his investigations that there was not enough evidence to convict Erap with).

Right now i don't even know if the phrase 'the Filipino is worth dying for' is still applicable, those people who went to 'edsa dos' made Ninoy Aquino's sacrifice in vain. i pity this country and its people, but goddam it, this country is my only country and home. but the 2001 events made me lose my faith, from the judicial system, from the senate and congress, from the media who should be fair and unbiased, from the church leaders (although with the new leadership, the church is tiptoing around political issues, perhaps to avoid embarassment of the likes from 'edsa dos'). but my cynicism towards this country's government is waning; but everyone must carry on and endure a little bit more of suffering, to appreciate more the little graces granted upon us.

2006-01-02T14:26:00.000+08:00

this should've been my first entry for 2006!

things i've learned from 2005

things i am thankful from 2005

Should auld acquaintance be forgot
And never brought to mind
Should auld acquaintaince be forgot
And auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne,
We'll tak' a cup o' kindness yet
For auld lang syne.

And surely you'll be your pint stowp
And surely I'll be mine,
And we'll drink a richt guid willy waught
For auld lang syne.

We twa hae run aboot the braes
And pu'd the gowans fine,
But we've wandered monie a wearie fit'
Since auld lang syne.

We twa hae paidled in the burn
Frae morning sun till dine
But seas a'tween us braid hae roared
Since auld lang syne

And here's a hand my trusty fere
And gie's a hand o' thine
And we'll tak' a cup o' kindness yet
For auld lang syne.

Happy Holidays!!!

2006-01-02T10:50:00.000+08:00

I haven't been posting a lot lately... well i've got a new job, but actually its more of i don't feel like posting these past few weeks... but anyhow, i enjoyed the holidays, well parts of it... the whole family is together, but i have to spend the week in between the two holidays going to work.

i haven't made any serious new year's resolution, i don't think i'll ever. but there's this one new year's resolution as a joke that stuck in my head, which is by next new year's celebration i'll just attend a party and drink champaign (even though i don't really like champaign!) while joining the countdown to 2007 and have a guy (preferably gorgeous) to kiss with when the clock strikes 24:00:00. but this means for the whole year of 2006 I have to find this guy to kiss with, well maybe, i hope so, i'll meet him at the party... but i'm still looking forward for 2006 with much more optimism, there's such lightness of feeling towards the coming year, that there's going to have major changes, i'm not sure what or where, but its going to happen. i don't know what it is and i haven't felt this way before about the new year. i just hope it stays for the whole year and that these changes will be good. i still wish for my country to have a better government though...

meanwhile i'm still waiting for the premiere showing of 'the chronicles of narnia: the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe.' the preview is just so good, i hope i'm not going to be disappointed after watching it. although i haven't read any of the books yet, i look forward to the movie experience of this timeless classic by C.S. Lewis. one good news i just read in a website, that the musical production of 'the lion, the witch and the wardrobe' by Trumpets was seen by the stepson of CS Lewis in 2002 and he loved it and became his favorite production, so he's been campaigning to have it shown around asia and even in London. isn't great! an original Filipino production to be shown in West End! I hope this project pushed through.

so i think this will be my first entry for 2006... how lame of me...

My Christmas Song

2005-12-18T17:08:00.000+08:00

This is my song this christmas. Its just that I love the movie 'Love Actually,' and this is in the soundtrack sung by this kid with a very beuatiful voice named Olivia Olson. And plus it wouldn't hurt if i wish the same thing... (",)

All I Want For Christmas Is You
by Mariah Carrey

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true...
All I want for Christmas
Is you...

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There is just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I don't need to hang my stocking
There upon the fireplace
Santa Claus won't make me happy
With a toy on Christmas day
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you...
You baby

ooh I won't ask for much this Christmas
I won't even wish for snow
I'm just gonna keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe
I won't make a list and send it
To the North Pole for Saint Nick
I won't even stay awake to
Hear those magic reindeer click
'Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding on to me so tight
What more can I do
Oh Baby all I want for Christmas is you
You...

All the lights are shining
So brightly everywhere
And the sound of children's
Laughter fills the air
And everyone is singing
I hear those sleigh bells ringing
Santa won't you bring me the one I really need
Won't you please bring my baby to me

Oh I don't want a lot for Christmas
This is all I'm asking for
I just want to see my baby
Standing right outside my door
Oh I just want him for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
Baby all I want for Christmas is
You

All I want for Christmas is you baby

i love harry

2005-11-29T14:49:00.000+08:00

i love harry potter! i love harry potter!

grabe kakatapos ko lang basahin yung OotP at HBP, as in magkasunod ko sila binasa. sobrang paganda ng paganda yung story. its getting darker and darker, and bloody tragic too! i'm excited about the 7th book! and of course the 5th movie! i wonder how are going to condense book 5 into a 2-3 hours movie... oh well they were able to pull it off with GoF, but still i would've wanted more stuff from the book included in the movie.

hindi ko kaagad binasa yung OotP nung bagong labas siya, kasi well gusto ko bilhin yung paperback, kasi lahat ng HP books ko eh paper back, so i have to wait for the release of the paper back. but then i had this annoying friend, na gusto nya mas higitan pa nya ko sa pagkalove ko sa harry potter, syet diba, eh di tinigil ko magbasa ng HP. as in, i lost interest for more than a year! to think i started reading HP way before the first movie installment was made (and i didn't watch immediately the first two movies when it was released, saw it only in DVD). kakainis kasi yung ganun eh, all i want was someone to talk with who really likes HP not someone to compete with about HP. but now that i haven't heard nor seen this annoying friend, i got all my interest and love of HP back.

my bestfriend was a great help, she lent me her paper back copy of OotP. the moment i started it i can not put it down. the plot just gets thicker and so much has been revealed as to what had happened before the Dark Lord attacked the Potter family. also what it was like when the Dark Lord was at the height of his power.

contrary to others' belief that OotP is not as good as GoF, i actually find OotP so much better than GoF. because some of the questions i had in GoF was answered in OotP, and GoF to me was so 'bitin.' OotP was also full of details, so much details was included into it about a lot of things about harry, and other things about the magical world he lives in. some questions way back from the first book was explained or answered in the 5th installment. parang naging transition period din ang OotP para kay harry, and everyone else sa book na rin, this book is where they and i find them to have matured.

at syempre yung HBP, OMG! its shorter than OotP, pero yung mga ilang questions from the previous five books were answered here. sobrang paganda ng paganda yung plot ng HP. i had a hard time accepting what happened at the end of HBP. sobrang naiyak talaga ako... grabe, hindi ako bumili nung book; for three weeks kasi pabalik-balik ako ortigas for my job application. so i pass by powerbooks store in megamall and sit down at the java man and read HBP (and of course order chocolate latte, coz i'm not allowed to drink coffee) . but when i got hired i know i can't go back and read anymore because i don't want to go home late. eh mga less than ten chapters na lang yung babasahin ko, syempre nakakabitin yun diba? so i went online and downloaded a copy (i know bad, but desperate times call for desperate measures). i was able to finish it last saturday. nung nasa last part na ko, my goodness, sabi ko buti na lang di ko siya sinubukan tapusin sa megamall, kasi sobrang iyak talaga ako... as in... buti na lang hindi ako inatake ng palpitations ko!

then after ko basahin yung HBP, sabi ko sa sister ko, tara manood na tayo ng GoF! gusto ko panoorin na! ngayon ko lang narealize na sobrang na-miss ko ang HP (no thanks to my annoying friend, grrr). so now i can't wait for the 7th book and the 5th movie! so excited! sana marelease na rin yung paper back ng HBP, para makabili na rin ako!

PS i've put some button links of HP websites, just click etc.

MVP

2005-11-25T15:33:00.000+08:00

so i went to see a cardiologist and had a 2D echo. the diagnosis was that i have mitral valve prolapse or MVP with a mitral regurgitation trace or MR trace. i'm not in the mood to explain it so here is what WebMD says about MVP:

The mitral valve is one of four valves that regulate blood flow in your heart. The valve is like a one-way gate. It allows blood to flow in only one direction, from the upper to the lower heart chambers (from the left atrium to the left ventricle).
Normally the mitral valve closes after blood flows through it. The closure keeps blood from leaking back into the upper chamber (left atrium).
If you have mitral valve prolapse (MVP), the valve flaps bulge backwards (prolapse) into the upper chamber.
Usually, the effect on your heart is minor because the seal between the two heart chambers remains tight enough to prevent leakage.
If the flaps don't seal tightly enough, however, blood could leak back into the left atrium. This is called mitral valve regurgitation. In most cases of mitral valve prolapse, this leakage doesn't happen.
Mitral valve prolapse has also been called floppy valve syndrome, Barlow's syndrome, and click-murmur syndrome.

so now the worry for me is over, i'm relieved that its not something fatal, but would require a proper care of my body. upon learning what i my heart problem is, i felt fine now, gone is the anxiety over it. but now i'm not allowed to drink coffee, softdrinks, or drinks with caffeine; i'm also not allowed to eat chips or junk foods. and i should always remember to slow down my movements, especially walking up on stairs.

----------

also i just started working for a market research company. its my first week here. so far its good, i haven't been doing a lot of things, just observe and feel what the business is all about. the people are nice, apparantly i know someone here back from college. its nice, having a familiar face to work with.

ciao!

i have a heart problem...

2005-11-15T07:32:00.000+08:00

... its broken.

seriously there's something physically wrong with my heart. i had a pre-employment exam last weekend. the exam included an ecg. when i return to hand in my stool sample, they asked me to take the ecg again, because there was something abnormal in one of the waves. the nurse said that its usually found with older people who already have heart problems.

earlier i called my new employer and asked if they got the result of my test and that i'm turning down their offer of employment coz i got another offer, they told they haven't but they were informed that i have some kind of problem with my ecg results. so i called the medical clinic and asked about the findings. they said that i need to consult with a cardiologist because they found that i have an anteroseptal ischemia. I asked what it is and she said that its when the heart lacks osygen to pump blood to the whole body. so i went on line and try to find out what the heck is anteroseptal ischemia, but i can not find any info about it. then i came across this forum somebody replied that anteroseptal ischemia is "That there is evidence of heart muscle lacking oxygen (ischemia) in the front portion of the heart, slightly offcenter towards the middle. This area has blood supplied from the left anterior descending coronary artery. "

when the information sinked in, i cried. kakaiyak siya noh, i mean serious condition siya. last week i almost fainted at mrt, and that time i had a hard time breathing and at the back of my mind i know i'm lacking oxygen. medyo naaning-aning pa ko, kasi now there's always the possibility that i might die of heart attack or something related anytime and anywhere! it made me think about my mortality. how ironic that a few years back all i wanted to do was to curl up on my side like a fetus, and let that last ray of the setting sun be my last sunshine. now i've got so much life, so many things to live for, now i'm being threatened with this condition.

-------

tama na kadramahan, masayang balita naman. as i was saying i got two employment offers this week. of course i have to turn down the other one. even if i already had undergone the medical exam. again kakatawa naman ang life, dati ala ako makita maayos na work, ngayon dala-dalawa ang nag-ooffer ng employment sakin. kung sabagay kasi dati sobrang ala talaga ako magustuhan na job, pero ngayon meron talaga ako gustong career na puntahan, kaya with a prayer and enough determination, i got what i want.

well for now i need to find a good cardiologist and have my heart checked. i just hope and pray that this condition is reversible, that there's some kind of medication to correct it.

tata!

nov 11th

2005-11-11T18:14:00.000+08:00

always, always have faith and pray. have faith in god, allah, or whatever or whoever you want to believe in, just have faith. be strong about that faith, and whatever obstacle or hardship you experience in life don't lose that faith, coz in the end that's all you got and a prayer, and that will save you.

nov 8th

2005-11-08T17:04:00.000+08:00

naisip ko lang maglagay ng mga simple lessons i learn everyday, things that we've been taught to do, but i haven't really appreciated that much, and yet when i experienced, naiisip ko na hay tama nga yung sabi nila.

life's simple lessons: when in eating at a restaurant or fast food, always be nice to the person getting your order and serving your food. and always count your change and be honest about it!

buti na lang natutunan ko in a good way (good karma ba), di tulad nung iba na walang idea na ginantihan na pala sila sa kanilang kasungitan.

nagpunta kasi ako ng megamall after ng job interview ko sa ortigas, so stroll stroll habang naghahanap ng cr. eh nakita ko yung powerbooks, eh magnet sa kin yang mga bookstore na ganyan. so pasok ako, tapos tingin tingin hanggang nakita ko yung stand ng mga harry potter books (katatapos ko lang basahin yung order of the pheonix, at sa wakas nagkaroon ulit ako ng gana magbasa ng harry potter, ibang kwento na kung bakit nawalan ako ng gana magbasa!).
syempre kinuha ko yung isang book na walang balot na plastik at tamang-tama eh malapit lang yung mga tables ng 'the java man.' so nakiupo muna ako dun sa kanila habang binabasa yung harry potter.

after mga three chapters, siguro napansin nila na magtatagal ako, eh nilapitan ako nung isang waiter at binigyan ng menu. syempre embarassed daw ako kasi nakikiupo ng hindi nag-oorder (tama talaga si ryan, kelangan mag-order kung makikiupo lang sa cafe!). so ayun napilitan ako mag-order.

nung hiningi ko yung bill at binayaran ko na at binigay na yung sukli, eh aba yung sukli sobra ng Php100! sa panahon ngayon malaga din yung 100 pesos noh! syempre naging mabuti akong bata at sinuli ko yung sobrang sukli. puro thanks ang narinig ko, sobrang pasalamat siguro nila, kasi syempre sa sweldo nila ibabawas yung kulang sa cash register.

tapos maya-maya eh lumapit ulit yung waiter at binigyan ako ng promo card nila (suki card na for every ten purchases of coffee, tea, whatever eh may free na yung next cup) na valid sa lahat ng 'the java man' daw. oh devah! eh hindi naman ako nag-order ng coffee, pero nilagyan nila ng 2 stamps!

hindi ko naman iniexpect na bibigyan nila ako ng ganun, pero syempre touch ako. so kayo be nice sa mga waiters at be honest, kasi they serve your food and God knows what kung ano ilalagay nila sa food mo kung masungit ka sa kanila. at kung honest ka they will show their appreciation din naman to you.

---------

may nangyari pa nung pauwi na ko. muntik pa kong himatayin sa hilo sa mrt! as in sobrang hiningal ako pagakyat ng hagdanan ng mrt, tapos pagsakay ko sobrang nahilo ako. naramdaman ko na lang na may rush ng dugo, tapos ala na kong marinig at nagdilim na yung paningin ko. pero sobrang di talaga ako bumigay, kasi ayoko naman himtayin sa loob ng mrt noh! so tinanong ko na lang yung lalakeng nakaupo sa may harapan ko kung pede paupuin ako kasi sobrang nahihilo na ko, tsaka nakita nila na medyo tumutungo na nga ako at namumutla na siguro. buti na lang mabait yung lalaki. nung mawala na yung hilo ko at bumalik na sa normal yung blood pressure ko eh, napaisip pa ko na naku baka inisip nung mama eh buntis ako! putsa! at syempre since nga medyo hilo-hilo ako eh sobrang bagal ko maglakad. sobrang hate ko pa man din yun. alam nung mga nakakakilala sa kin na mabili ako maglakad at hate ko yung mga taong sobrang pabagal-bagal. grabe as in ang bagal ko maglakad, mas nauunahan pa ko ng mga lola at lolo! buti na lang safe ako nakauwi, di ko talaga alam kung ano nangyari sakin, pero for sure kelangan ko ng exercise!

oct 27th

2005-10-27T14:20:00.000+08:00

eto marami na naman ako oras para mag-surf ng mag-surf on line, kaya eto ilan sa mga website na nakita ko, na gusto ko recommend sa kung sino man ang gustong magbasa nito.

green thumb creative - kakatawa yung 'awesomely bad logos' na article nila

impassioned mystery - cool lang yung blog na to

world class cuisine - a collection of well loved filipino recipes

Holloweentown.org - resource site ng mga die hard fans ng movie ni tim burton na 'the nightmare before christmas' dito ko po din nakuha yung mga ginamit ko sa blogskin ko... cool to... nung bata ako lagi ko pinapanood yang movie na yan, di ko naisip nun na magiging cult movie siya...

at para sa mga fans ng mayfair witches trilogy ni anne rice nakita ko ang mga sites na ito habang naghahanap ako ng pedeng magamit sa mayfair witches theme na blogskin ko. love ko talaga si anne rice at ang kanyang mga witches at vampires...

MsJekyll's Web
Anne Rice's Mayfair Witches
Lives of the Mayfair Witches

oct 27

2005-10-27T11:59:00.000+08:00

its Iana's Bday!!!

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hay sa wakas, naayos ko na rin tong skin ng blog ko! one week din akong nag-research at pinag-aralan ng mabuti yang mga html, css, at javascript coding na yan! putsa! gusto ko nga sana na theme ng blogskin eh mayfair witches ni anne rice, pero saka na yun, hirap hanap pix ng bahay ni anne rice on line na maganda yung angle ng pagkakakuha. putsa! kelangan ko pa pumunta new orleans para lang photograph yung bahay nya! (ay dating bahay pala, nabenta na nya nga pala yun). syempre mega aral din ako ng adobe photoshop, para original ang background image ng blgoskin ko, oh da vah! marami pa akong idadagdag sa blogskin ko, kaya hindi pa ito ang final look...

tata!!

oct 21st

2005-10-21T17:19:00.000+08:00

my father's bday...

---------

hay dios ko di ko pa rin maayos yung blogskin na 'nightmare before christmas,' truly naging nightmare ko siya. tapos habang inaayos ko yung template nya, aba biglang namatay tong computer ko! peste! hindi ko pa man din na-save yung file! grrr! talaga!

at syempre worried to death pa ko na may sira tong comp namin, dala ko kagad sa service center dyan sa may waltermart. at tulad nga ng aking suspetya, power supply ang may sira, at sabi pa nung technician eh may isang transformer or whatever sa motherboard ang naapektuhan. syempre dali-dali ako bumili ng bagong power supply. hay pero ala pa rin warranty na di masisira ng tuluyan yung motherboard, its just a matter of time na lang daw.

oh well, ganun talaga. pagkatapos ko pagawa yung comp eh nagutom ako. eh di punta ako dun sa may foodcourt ng waltermart. bibili sana ako shawarma, kahit di siya masarap eh pagtyagaan na rin, kaso naman di pa daw ready yung beef, mga 20 minutes pa daw. eh putsa gutom na ko noh. so ayun lipat sa kabilang tindahan, mga dimsums at noodles. chinese turo-turo ba. eh di bili ako siomai at siopao for take out. pagdating ko sa bahay eh punta ako kusina, tapos nakita ko yung rice cooker, naku may kanin pa. eh di napaisip ako, hmmm... ang tagal ko nang hindi nakakakain ng siomai with rice.

at habang kumakain ako, ng mag-isa as usual tuwing lunch, eh naalala ko yung college days. nung ang pinakamatipid na lunch eh siomai with rice sa college canteen. syempre reminiscing daw ako mag-isa. putsa. pero di ako nalungkot or yung nag-wish na sana college ulit ako, napaisip lang na 'those where the good ole days' at happy ako na i had those memories to remember. napaisip pa nga ako na magka-memorial day kaya ako ng sarili ko, yung bang isang araw isang taon i'll just remember those days in college, and just be happy and thankful that i have those memories to look back and those friends whom i'll always remember. sarap maging estudyante, pero syempre mas masarap mabuhay.

---------

yun lang po.

photo updates

2005-10-16T14:51:00.000+08:00

I've added few photos in my photoblog. the photos were from my field data gathering in Legazpi, Albay two years ago. some of the photos were taken by my friend using her nokia 7650, and some were taken using my old P&S cam, that's why some of the photos are in poor quality.

October 14th

2005-10-14T20:16:00.000+08:00

its my brother's birthday...

----------

today, life played a pretty cruel joke on me.
one lesson i will not forget.
someday i might find it a funny thing about life,
but for now it was not funny at all.

-----------

when you're a creative writer, writing fiction, when does imagination become reality, and when does reality become imagination? --- why do i ask this? its related to the above.

----------

the bus' tv-on-board was tuned in to a local channel showing a korean telenovela, and the scene was there's this girl and guy, they were arguing about something, and then the girl was so annoyed that she went on ranting about the meaning of something, in the middle of her diatribe, the guy suddenly kissed her.

i wonder what would have happened if this scene was done in 'the x-files.' imagine mulder and scully arguing about some paranormal case that mulder wants to investigate and scully, the ever skeptical, on a rant about the implausibility of the case, and all of sudden he kissed her in the middle of her ranting.

i imagine mulder never really paid much attention to what she's saying, he only wants to get on an argument with her because he gets off from it. and when she's in her 'there's-got-to-be-an-explanation-for-this' mode, his mind goes into this mode 'kiss-her, don't-kiss-her, kiss-her, don't-kiss-her.' and that's when the sexual tension builds up, which is one part of the show that will hook you.

but let me tell you something about sexual tension, it sucks!

----------

that's all folks!!!

October 1st 2005

2005-10-02T16:29:00.000+08:00

now i have another reason to remember this date. its my godson's birthday.

at long last, i got a chance to get out from the four corners of sta. rosa, laguna for a day.

where did i go? a very far away place called Real, Quezon. yes, my birth place and the same place where the ormoc-like tragedy happened a year ago.

the condition of the road was so bad because of what happend last year. there were many cracks and large potholes. there were still debris from the landslides shoved on the side of the road. the sandy beaches were gone, also the many resorts that lined the coast, instead rocks, small and large, and soil from the mountains lined the coast. i can't help but imagine if there were still bodies burried under all those rubble.

it was in poblacion, near the main town of real (bayan), that my relatives live. it was the same town that recuers had a hard time getting into, because the bridge was gone, and it was also the town to pass through going to infanta. but now there is a provisional bridge, with only one vehicle at a time can pass. my aunt tells us that it was quite scarry for her that morning after the rush of water from the river and mountain. under heavy rain and strong winds she walks back and forth from her house to the municipal hall to ration rice and food, because the evacuees there are in need of food. while walking she saw dead bodies lining up the street, and she was scared. its quite a miracle that their house wasn't damaged. their house stands a meter below the ground, but the flood water somehow didn't enter their house. they were asleep and didn't have an idea what was happening outside their door.

what saddened me yesterday was that the beach at the back of my aunts house is no longer a beach. the local government had built another dike and its nearer the shoreline. when i was a kid there weren't dikes there, and from my grandma's house i would cross the street and run to the beach, only wearing panties (sometimes not) and a salbabida (life saver ring). that was when i was about two years old. that's the reason i love the place, because my earliest memory was there. almost everyday i would go to the beach and play on the surf with my cousins. sad thing about that i never learned how to swim. quite ironic isn't?

why was i there? my cousin (from my mother's side) invited me to be the godmother of her second son. at first i thought it was just a christening i was going to attend, apparently my cousin and her husband chose to christen him on his first birthday, a double celebration. i went there on my own, well not really, i hitched a ride with cousins from batangas, but my parents and siblings didn't want to attend, so i was on my own there.

the double celebration also sort of become a family reunion. cousins, aunts, and grandparents from my mother's side of the family, whom i haven't seen in a long time was there.

it was fun seeing my cousins again. and its quite surreal that we've all grown up, and some of them already married and have children. but of course in every family gathering there's always the downside. its depressing when you see some aunts and cousins whose lives become poorer because of their wrong choices in life and depend on the graces of those who are well-to-do in the family. i just hope that they would pick-up their lazy asses and work hard for themselves and their children, and not be beggars to their relatives, especially when they have skills that could make them earn a lot.

it was a day of firsts. obviously its the first day of the month, my godson's first birthday, the first time i saw my cousins and aunt after a very long time, the first time after five years i saw Real and after the tragedy last year, the first time i saw my goddaughter (who happens to be my second cousin), the first time i ever attended an invitation to a christening (that's why i haven't seen my other godchildren!), the first time i went on a backride on a scooter, actually my first ride on a motorcycle!

how did i ended up on the back ride seat of my cousin's scooter? my cousins from batangas wanted to leave early; they were in my aunts house, while i was at the resort were the birthday party was celebrated. so they asked my other cousin to pick me up from the resort. so he picked me up using their scooter. my aunt wanted to go with us, to say goodbye personally, but doesn't want to backride with us, coz she gets nervous when her son is driving. all the more reason for me to be nervous too! we didn't wear any protective gears, like a helmet, and i have a bag on one arm and a plastic bag of food in the other. i was holding so tight to my cousin's waist and shirt. but i thought what the hell, its my only chance to ride a motorbike, might as well enjoy it before i crash my head on the ground. so with rush of adrenaline, i climbed the backride seat, and it was a blast!!! i love it! made me remember a line from a song: i love the free fresh wind in my hair, life without care, i'm broke that's oke. i can't really describe it, but the feel of the wind on my face and passing through in between my blouse's buttons, was great. right now i'm thinking about learning how to drive a motorbike! yeah!!!

i took some pics, its few, and quite surprising, i didn't get to take a picture of my godson!!

Lets Do It (Lets Fall in Love)

2005-09-23T20:23:00.001+08:00

Birds do it, bees do it
Even educated fleas do it
Lets do it, lets fall in love
In spain, the best upper sets do it
Lithuanians and letts do it
Lets do it, lets fall in love
The dutch in old amsterdam do it
Not to mention the fins
Folks in siam do it - think of siamese twins
Some argentines, without means, do it
People say in boston even beans do it
Lets do it, lets fall in love
Romantic sponges, they say, do it
Oysters down in oyster bay do it
Lets do it, lets fall in love
Cold cape cod clams, gainst their wish, do it
Even lazy jellyfish, do it
Lets do it, lets fall in love
Electric eels I might add do it
Though it shocks em I know
Why ask if shad do it - waiter bring me "shad roe"
In shallow shoals english soles do it
Goldfish in the privacy of bowls do it
Lets do it, lets fall in love

Transcribed (from the stated recording) by todd peach todd@thepeaches.com

I was looking for some MP3s of Ella Fitzgerald on line a few months back. I downloaded this, not really sure what the song was about. Just listening to the first line my brain already made a connection. I believe I haven't mentioned in this blog that I'm a huge fan of The X-files, when I heard this song, I remembered a line from Mulder saying to Scully: Birds do it, bees do it, even educated MDs do it. Now it has a different meaning! He was asking Scully to fall in love! kakakilig! I miss The X-files!!!

onli en da Pilipins

2005-09-21T22:10:00.000+08:00

sa buong mundo saan walang OFW? eh di sa Pilipinas.

sayang, dahil sa bumababang kalidad ng edukasyon, hindi #1 exporter ang Pilipinas ng mga engineer, doktor, nurses at kung ano-ano pang propesyon, talagang pang-DH export lang ang Pilipinas.

Future Forecast: By 2015 poverty in the world will be reduced by half. About half of the remaining that still live below poverty line are in the Philippines.

Salamat po sa gobyerno ng Pilipinas sa kanilang pagsisikap na palitan ang Bangladesh at iba pang mahihirap na bansa sa Africa sa talaan ng pinakamahirap na bansa .

magaling daw ang emergency service ng Pilipinas. naku salamat sa mga illegal loggers at corrupt na opisyal ng gobyerno ng Pilipinas. bakit? eh kung wala sila eh di taon-taon walang mga landslide at pagbaha, walang pagpapraktisan ang emergency service.

ang Pilipino ay overworked at underpaid, except sa mga government officials na ibinoto. kaya naman gusto ko malaman sa mga Pilipinong botante na sigurado ka bang Pilipino ang binoboto mo?

ang mga masang Pilipino mahilig sa people power, kasi may mga artista, may kantahan at sayawan pa, syempre may kainan din, at higit sa lahat babayaran ka pa. saan ka ba naman nakakita ng street party na babayaran ka para lang pumunta?

sa Pilipinas, ang manggagawang Pilipino binubuwisan ng binubuwisan para may ipambayad sa mga utang ang gobyernong Pilipinas, samantala ang mga opisyal ng gobyerno nakaw ng nakaw sa nasabing buwis.

sa africa maiintindihan ko pa kung bakit sila sobrang naghihirap, kasi puro civil war at kung ano anong kaguluhan pa, eh sa Pilipinas may civil war ba? Hmm siguro yun na lang ang kulang... para masabing totoong naghihirap na ang Pilipinas.

sa Pilipinas dami gusto maging presidente, odibah daming concerned sa mga Pilipinong mahihirap, tama nga ba?

sa Pilipinas sinasabi ng gobyersno na walang pondo para sa mga proyektong kinakailangan sa ikakaunlad ng bansa, pero kung para sa mga pambyahe ng mga opisyal sa ibang bansa o kaya pambili ng mga mamahaling sasakyan ng mga ahensya ng gobyerno, eh merong pondo.

sa ibang bansa ang kanilang mga gobyerno nagtratrabaho para sa ikakaunlad ng kanilang bansa, ang gobyerno ng Pilipinas, nagtratrabaho para sa ikapagpapahirap ng bansa.

ang mga doktor sa Pilipinas nagiging nurse para makapunta sa abroad; sa Pilipinas uso ang downgrading o demotion para sa madaming propesyon.

---eto muna sa ngayon, mga obserbasyon sa Pilipinas---

Tagged again!

2005-09-19T20:35:00.000+08:00

I've been tagged again, although i didn't do the first one, luckily both blogger friends sent me the same tag.

1. What are the things you enjoy doing even when there's no one around you?

ditto, mia. hahahaha! i read, read, and read. and play my 'swing and the standards' cd or les miz cd, then turn up the volume to the highest level, then close my eyes. sometimes i play the same track over and over again, 'sing sing sing' from 'swing and the standards' and 'at the end of the day' or 'do you hear the people sing' from les miz.

2. What lowers your stress/blood pressure/anxiety level?

ditto, mia. hahahaha! if i find myself in a situation where in i'm stressed or feel my blood is at its boiling point, i try go get away from that situation and do other things, until i've calm down or refreshed. that way i'm able to avoid being super bitch to others.

3. Tag 5 friends and ask them to post it in theirs.

vanina
sheryl berardinelli
mako
niña
patrice

gamit

2005-09-15T19:10:00.000+08:00

sa pagpapalit ng gamit
tuwing sampung tao nga ba?
eh kung madami ka pera
eh di gada buwan magpalit ka!
ngunit kung matibay mga
gamit binibili mo eh
di gada sampung taon nga
ang pagpapalit mo!
tulad ng washing machine
o kaya ng aircon
sana kung marami pera
kotse kaya anoeh kung mukha kaya?
naku mahal yun
at kaninong mukha naman ang tutularan mo?

sana nga ganun kadali
magpalit ng mga bagay
sa buhay
tulad-halimbawa ng mga
relasyon,
palitan ang ama o ina
kung di mo gusto
kanilang parenting skills
o kaya palitan ang lahat ng kamag-anak mo!
sana tulad sila ng
kasintahan, kahit araw-araw
palitan ayos lang!

teka magandang ideya yan ah
kolek ng kolek,
at syempre 100 meters above the sea level,
abot pa hanggang langit
ang antas ng aksyon sa
kama mo!
iba-ibang kasiping
di lang sa kama
pati sa sofa, sa lamesa
sa taas ng washing machine,
eh sa antas na iyan
talagang kailangang palitan
nga mga gamit mo sa bahay!

Welcome to the August 2005 Global Movement for Children newsletter! Please scroll down to read more.

2005-09-10T11:47:00.000+08:00

4. A taster of a campaign on each continent
5. Powerful countries set to betray hopes of millions at UN world summit

A taster of a campaign on each continent?
Children's organisations and other members of civil society are getting together across the globe as part of the Global Call to Action against Poverty to make demands on their heads of state. To find out more about other campaigns see http://www.whiteband.org.

Ethiopia
The Ethiopian National Coalition is called Poverty Action Network of Civil Society in Ethiopia (PANE). Beginning as a task force in 2001 and in 2004 after the launch of the poverty reduction strategy program, PANE decided to focus its energies from a task force into a network which now consists of more than 70 civil society organizations, non governmental organizations (NGOs), professional associations and research institutions working on poverty and related issues in the country.

PANE has thus far conducted familiarization and awareness raising workshops in five regions based on sustainable development and poverty reduction, the role of civil society in poverty reduction in general and Millennium Development Goals in particular and also formed chapters in all these regions. Additionally, they have conducted monitoring and evaluation of MDG performance mechanisms in Ethiopia covering 75 percent of Ethiopia's population.

In spite of the obviously great successes of PANE, the campaign has not been officially launched in Ethiopia despite several attempts. This has apparently been due to cancellations of all mass rallies planned by PANE by the Ethiopian government. PANE has thus tentatively set the official launch date for mid-August and this time they hope they will not be hindered. Contact Eshetu Bekele : eb.fss@telecom.net.et

Bolivia
The 'Make Poverty History' (MPH) campaign in Bolivia is composed of around thirty civil society organizations. The campaign has released a position paper on external debt and its negative impact on the fulfillment of Human Rights in Bolivia. To publicize the First White Band Day and educate the public, MPH prepared posters and radio messages broadcast on twenty radio stations around the country and had a thirty-second advert on the main television networks in Bolivia. On the day itself, MPH wrapped white bands around the main buildings in Bolivia. Thousands of young people participated in street demonstrations on this day, in addition to debates on issues of poverty being organized in various cities.

The current political situation in Bolivia is such that there is an interim government that has been mandated to arrange for the general elections later on this year. MPH has planned to organize debates with the main presidential candidates to get their positions on trade, debt and aid. On a more international level, they are focusing their attentions on activities around white band day two and the upcoming Millennium + 5 UN Summit. Contact Dr. Oscar Lanza Van Den Berghe: aisbol@ceibo.entelnet.bo

India
National and State Governments in India often make commitments for the welfare of the citizen prior to entering office. In most of the cases, the commitments are not seriously pursued either due to weak political will, inadequate planning or insufficient resource allocation. Weak pursuance of the state or political system for the fulfillment of the promises is primarily due to inadequate voice of the common citizen to make their governments accountable. It is with this in mind that the Indian national coalition picked its name, Wada Na Todo Abhiyan. 'Wada Na Todo Abhiyan' is primarily a campaign of the citizens reminding governments of the promises made by them and to hold them accountable.

Wada na Todo was formed with civil society organizations from all over India in 2004 at the Indian Social Institute in New Delhi after a national consultation for a long-term strategy for the campaign. About 400 participants from various states representing voluntary organisations, activists involved in various campaigns, media, academia and trade union and mass organisations contributed in building a shared perspective on the objectives of the campaign.

On White Band Day 1, Indian activists participated in demonstrations and held a children's rally where children presented their demands to the Prime Minister. Simultaneously, the adults were presenting demands to G8 embassies in India from their citizens.The Indian national coalition already has concrete plans for White Band Day 2 to hold a people's summit exploring issues that will be presented to the United Nations in New York. Contact info@socialwatchindia.com.

USA
The ONE campaign grew out of the Heart of America tour in 2002, in which a busload of citizens and celebrities toured the mid-West in support of a new U.S. initiative on global AIDS. The success of that trip ensured that a new constituency of Americans were raising their voices for Africa and needed to be heard. Together with the Better Safer World Campaign, representing nine of the largest, private aid agencies (with 3 million supporters) working together to fight global poverty, and Bread for the World, a Christian voice for ending hunger for more than 30 years, the ONE campaign got off to a great start.

The campaign was launched in front of Independence Hall in Philadelphia on May 16 with the help of supporters like the NBA's Dikembe Mutombo and U2's Bono, co-founder of DATA. Since then, over 250,000 people have signed the declaration to support an historic pact for compassion and justice - and help the poorest people in the world overcome AIDS and extreme poverty.

In June, the ONE Campaign not only took an active part in the Long Walk to Justice but was actively involved with the organization and successful organization of Live 8 Philadelphia which was aired around the world and where a host of stars lent their support to the campaign against poverty through music. ONE has advertised on national televisions and has pop ups on the internet publicizing its campaign. The ONE Campaign is currently working on the Millennium +5 United Nations Summit.See: http://www.one.org

Join the Global Call to Action against Poverty and wear a white band on September 10th! See www.whiteband.org for more information.

*******************************

5. Powerful countries set to betray hopes of millions at UN world summit

A few days away from the UN World Summit, the world's largest ever anti-poverty campaign is gravely concerned that countries including the United States are undermining the Summit outcome, and ensuring its failure.

The Global Call to Action against Poverty (GCAP) warns that by cutting agreed wording designed to end poverty, governments are trying to edit away the future of the world's poorest people.

The current draft of the Summit outcome declaration contains strong statements on fighting poverty. However, the United States has proposed deleting key wording on tackling global poverty and disease. The proposed US changes include cutting all references to the Millennium Development Goals - the internationally agreed targets for halving world poverty. The US also wants to cut all references to small arms controls and weaken wording on all governments' responsibility to protect civilians in cases of mass killing such as the Rwandan genocide.

The United States is the main culprit in trying to water down the proposals, with the tacit approval of many other governments. Japan's Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi and German Chancellor Gerhard Schroeder are even threatening not to attend the crucial Summit.

If the declaration is so substantially weakened, the largest gathering of world leaders in history will result in failure.

Currently, 1.2 billion people around the globe live on less than one dollar a day and half the world?s population - three billion people - live on under two dollars every day.'The World Summit could go down in history as the meeting where the most powerful people in the world turned their backs on the poorest,' said Kumi Naidoo, chair of the Global Call to Action against Poverty. 'If leaders refuse to even mention the commitments they made at the millennium summit, they will leave no doubt about their intentions towards the world's poor.''Importantly,' Naidoo continued, 'a growing number of citizens in these rich countries are showing greater commitment to fighting global poverty than their governments, who are, in fact, betraying their citizens' sense of a common global humanity.'

Millions of people across the world as part of the Global Call to Action against Poverty are calling on their leaders to honor their word and keep their commitments. United by the campaign's global symbol, the white band, world leaders will be 'woken up' to poverty on 10 September, just before leaving for New York, by alarm bells, marches and iconic buildings wrapped with the white band.

From the GMC Secretariat

the rape of manila

2005-09-07T12:13:00.000+08:00

Somewhere beyond my dreams
A woman in white screams
Slashes and flashes of bayonets
Turns her dress into bloody red.

Reaching out her bloody hands, the
Slit-eyed tormentor behind her stands,
Dropping kicks and punches, here
And there, her savior nowhere near.

Unsatisfied with her open dress
Knifed her womb with a violent caress,
Disemboweling her with a laugh
As if that was never enough.

Such is the fate of a mother,
Beloved, with a heart so tender,
To suffer indignity before freedom
And die in a city of bedlam.

This nightmare of the relative past
May settle on the grounds like dust,
But beyond my dreams and memories
Hers is one of the untold stories.

I started writing this poem about a month ago, and still in the process of editing, i intend to add some more details to it. it was inspired by the 60th anniversary of victory over japan day(VJ Day). i've seen several documentaries about WWII, both the european and asian war. i've also read several articles about it. one particular article said that manila near the end of the war, was almost like warsaw, everything was destroyed, everybody and everything are being shot and bombed (american soldiers sometimes mistake filipinos for japanese), women and children are rounded, raped, and killed by the japanese soldiers. the sad truth was that its not written in many history books, just a few and in passing only. one particular book that was detailed about that part of manila's history was the "rape of manila, the warsaw of asia." a few sentences described what was written in that book, and my imagination just ran wild on how it was during that time.

PS i've added a new detail, to give the poem a violent picture, coz that is war. in a war you see an image of a boy crying over the body of his mother and baby brother, still clutched tightly to her chest, that image alone brings to mind how violent a war can be.

Save Philippine Children in Prison

2005-09-05T15:09:00.000+08:00

"Dear Friends,I have just read and signed the online petition: "Save Philippine Children in Prison"hosted on the web by PetitionOnline.com, the free online petitionservice, at: http://www.PetitionOnline.com/FilChild/I personally agree with what this petition says, and I think you mightagree, too. If you can spare a moment, please take a look, and considersigning yourself."

I've emailed this to several friends. I haven't seen the report that was shown in CNN nor the infamous BUNSO (Youngest) documentary by the same people who filmed MINSAN LANG SILANG MGA BATA ("Children only once" one of the best documentary film I've ever seen very touching and moving), but i've been reading about it in the internet. I can only imagine what was shown in the report and the documentary, based from what I've read. I'm appealing to readers of this blog, Filipinos and non-Filipinos, please sign the petition, so that our government would take action. these children in prisons, whose basic rights are being violated, cannot speak forthemselves, but we who knows better can. The Philippines will assume the presidency of the UN Ssecurity Council this month, the petition will also be presented in time with the UN convention. Pressure should be put upon the Philippine governement to take action and adhere to the international laws that the government says they are committed to.

ballet

2005-09-03T14:33:00.000+08:00

I accompany my sister every Saturday to her ballet class. These pictures were taken on her third saturday. I just want to experiment with my cam, especially the manual operations. I took some black and white photos just for dramatic effect. That saturday the teacher wasn't thirty-minutes late, the kids were well behaved, the one stage mother wasn't there and one father was video recording the class. I should've taken photos of the parents, they are one fine bunch, its just I don't think they'd be happy to be my photo subjects!

my painting

2005-09-02T13:11:00.000+08:00

This is my first attempt at painting. My sister loves "Art Attack" so we thought it would be a nice after school activity for her at home to explore her artistics abilities. I also tried it, of course. This is the result. its a water color painting at the back of a paper plate. my sister unfortunately decided to add some unnecessary stuff on it. even wrote the word two in her drawn boxes! hehe

the world challenge, vote for RP

2005-08-23T10:50:00.000+08:00

somebody sent through yahoogroups an email regarding a philippine project as one of the 12 finalist for BBC's and Newsweek's the world challenge competition. the website is http://www.theworldchallenge.co.uk please visit the website and know more about the finalists and support the philippine entry.

From the mouths of babes

2005-08-18T23:51:00.000+08:00

We were having dinner the other night, talking about trivial things. then I asked my mother what she did her last birthday (she wasn't in the country at that time). my five-year old sister heard the word birthday and came up to my mother and excitedly said:
"Ma sa birthday ko, punta tayo hongkong disneyland. Dun ako magbibirthday!" (Ma, on my birthday lets go to disneyland. I want to celebrate there!)
My mother trying not to disappoint her, because of the unlikeliness of it happening, said, "Eh wala kang mga bisita dun." (You won't have any guests there.)
To which my sister replied matter-of-factly, "Sina Minie Mouse at Donal Duck bisista ko." (Minie Mouse and Donald Duck will be my guests!)
Of course to her mickey and his friends would be the best birthday guests ever!
--------
Our house helper decided to leave, which is a wise decision for me. Since my mother wouldn't be here for long periods of time, and she thought it would be hard for us taking care of a five-year old without house help, she decided to buy an automatic waching machine. The day our helper left, my mother purchased one. When she got home we asked what brand she bought, when it will be delivered, how much, etc etc. Then the discussion turned into assigning house chores to each of us. I will be the cook, my brother the dish washer, my younger sister sister will clean the house on weekends (she wasn't present at that time to object). My five-year old sister, not wanting to be left out, announced: "Ako ang maglalaba!" (I will do the laundry!)
(hija kaya nga tayo bumili ng automatic washing machine eh, para yun na ang maglalaba!)

bagyo sa dagat

2005-08-08T07:02:00.000+08:00

inaanod sa may pampang,
sabay sa hampas ng hangin
ang bagsak ng tubig,
doon sa dalampasigan
nakatirik buhay ko't pagibig.
bawat agos ng alon
may dala sanang ligaya
ngunit putik at dumi ngayon
hatid ng iyong pulang parusa.
higit pa sa isang unos
ang pagdating mo sa mundo
ko na siyang niyanig
ng nagliliyab mong amok.
ako'y nananalangin sa may poon
patawarin sintang irog
upang makaahon na
sa pananalantang dulot
na kamalian at katiwalian
na siyang naging daan
upang ika'y maghimagsik.
bukas nawa'y magpakita
daang-hari at haring araw
sabay sa pag-mulat
ng mga matang gising at
isipang malaya.

politics and fate

2005-08-07T17:51:00.000+08:00

last friday the unexpected news of the death of former senator raul rocco schocked the nation. he was a forerunner on the 2004 presidential election, together with current president arroyo and the deceased fpj.

hmmm... my sister and i got to thinking that it must be fate, if not rigged elections, that gma won the presidency. two of her rival candidates died whithin a year after the elections. can't help but imagine in what sort of situation would the philippines if fpj won and died of stroke six months later. or if rocco won and he dies a year later. would there be a smooth transition of power or would there be power-hungry politicians taking advantage of the situation? but one thing for sure we wouldn't be experiencing this "political crisis" that is occupying the minds of filipinos. but then again, we wouldn't be talking about changes, radical or not, in the country's politics and form of government.

thankful maybe we should be, that mrs. arroyo won. programs and reforms that she is presenting and implementing have done good for the country. her resistance to calls of resignations gives her strength and a president in control. whether she rigged the elections or not, she is still the one seated in malacañang and doing what a president should be doing. we should move on, stop all these bickering and whining about our little lives. all these rallies and protests has turned into annoyance.

fifty-five word short story

2005-07-31T21:54:00.000+08:00

may nabili ako libro sa book sale. writer's block: 786 ideas to jump-start your imagination by Jason rekulak. 4X4 inches yung size nung book, tapos mga 5 inches ang kapal niya. mukha talaga siyang block for writers. binili ko siya hindi dahil sa nauubusan ako ng immagination sa pagsusulat, kaya lang maganda yung book kung may writers block ka o kaya sa mga writing excercises, na siya namang maganda para sa mga bagong manunulat. ito ang pansamantala kong ginagawa habang binubuo ko pa ang isa kong "ambitious writing project."

gusto ko lang din ibahagi yung isang idea nakuha ko sa book na ito. noong 1987 nagkaroon ng contest ang isang pahayagan sa california. ang pacontest nila ay ang pagsusulat ng isang maikling kwento gamit ang 55 words lamang. at ang isang winning entry ay yung kay jeff whitmore ang pamagat ay bedtime stories. eto yung kanyang sinulat:

bedtime stories by jeff whitmore
"Careful, honey, its loaded," he said, re-entering the bedroom.
Her back rested against the headboard. "This for your wife?"
"No. Too chancy. I'm hiring a professional."
"How about me?"
He smirked. "Cute. But who'd be dumb enough to hire a lady hit man?"
She wet her lips, sighting along the barrel.
"Your wife."

ang galing noh. sobrang nahanga ako dun sa sumulat. as in mga tatlong beses ko siya binasa. sa 55 words napaloob niya ang mga elementong love, sex, betrayal, revenge and murder! sobrang na-inspire ako kaya naman gumawa din ako ng akin. sana lang kahit konti ay nakuha niya yung dating nung short story ni mr. whitmore. eto yung aking sinulat:

Sa ER
"Clear?" tanong ng doktor.
"Clear!" sigaw ng nurse.
Beeeeeeep.
"Isa pa! Clear?"
"Clear!"
Beeeeeeeep.

Napailing lamang ang doktor, at napapikit ang nurse.
"Paano nabaril?"
"Ligaw na bala daw dok, kawawang bata."
Lumabas sila dala ang masamang balita kay Nanay.

"Halika, hinihintay ka na." sabi ng katabi kong nakaitim.
Humawak ako sa kanyang kamay. Paalam, Nanay.

sinulat ko sa pilipino, kasi dun ko gusto masanay magsulat. pakiusap, feedback naman dyan. constructive criticism and the likes. salamat po.

PS. i keep changing some things, its still in the editing and revising stage, but i still would like to hear what ya think. tnx (",)

the aristocats siesta

2005-07-29T13:57:00.000+08:00

posted by hL

sa aking pananaw...

2005-07-27T09:07:00.000+08:00

napaisip ako, pano nga kung matuloy ang pagbabago ng ating saligang batas, at maging parliamentary-federal goverment and pilipinas, ano kaya ang ipapalit sa titulong "republika ng pilipinas?" syempre hindi na republika ang pilipinas kung maging federal ang ating sistema ng ating pamahalaan. magiging "united states of the philippines" kaya ang pilipinas, ang pangit noh USP. sa bagay hindi naman pede yun kasi hindi naman pedeng gawing mga estado ang mga probinsya, eh di "united provinces of the philippines" kaya?

hehehe! ipasintabi muna ang pagbibiro, ang republika ng pilipinas ay makikilala na lamang philippines o pilipinas kung mangyayari nga ang pagbabago ng ating gobyerno. sana nga matuloy na ito, upang matapos na ang mga gulo sa ating political system. nakakasawa na at nakakapagod na sila eh.

noong pumutok ang balitang tungkol sa gloriagate, ang una ko naisip eh paniwalaan kaagad, kasi pare pareho naman sila. sino bang hindi nandadaya sa kanila sa eleksyon? subalit sa panawagang magresign na ang presidente, dun na ako hindi sangayon. kasi sino ang ipapalit nila? kung mismong oposisyon ay watak watak, mukhang civil war lang ang kalalabasan, kung sila sila ay mag-aagawan sa pinakamakapangyarihang posisyon sa politika. hay.

ako mismo ayaw ko kay gma. pero sino naman ang papalit sa kanya. artistang alang alam? mga power hungry politician na mga mandaraya din? noong nagbigay siya ng speech sa radyo ng bayan noong isang linggo, nagkaroon ako ng bagong paggalang sa kanya. sapagkat siya mismo inamin niya na maraming mali sa sistema ng gobyerno at politika sa pilipinas. at na silang lahat sa gobyerno ay may mga pagkakamaling ginawa at dapat silang lahat din ay mag-kaisa upang baguhin ito. sangayon ako dyan, isantabi na muna nila ang politika at magkaisa sa isyu ng pagkakaroon ng pagbabago. hindi na kasi maganda tingnan na lagi na lang pumupunta sa lansangan ang mga tao upang pakinggan ang kanilang mga hinaing, at mas masakit din na malaman na ginagamit lang sila ng mga makasariling politiko.

may iisang layunin ang lahat hinggil sa mga isyu na pumutok nung isang buwan, at ito ay ang pagbabago. dito tayo lahat magsimula, kung anong pagbabago ang gusto nating mangyari. ito na lang ang isipin nating lahat: (a) si pgma ay may mga mungkahi hinggil sa mga pagbabago na maaring gawin. ito ay ang pagpapalit ng uri ng gobyerno upang mapabilis ang serbisyo sa taong bayan at mapabuti ang sistemang politikal ng ating bansa. at sangayon din siya sa pagusad ng impeachment sa kongreso, sapagkat ito ang mas mabuting paraan na naayon sa saligang batas. (b) ang oposisyon, walang maiharap sa taong bayan ng plano o kung sino ang papalit kay pgma kung siya nga ay magresign.

ano saan ka?

2005-07-09T04:20:00.000+08:00

the other day the euphoria in london when they won the bidding for the olympic games in 2012 died down together with the last breath of those who got caught in the bombing of three passenger trains and a bus. the incident made me remember my train bombing dream that i had four months ago. there are still few details that i remember, but forgot to write it down. in the dream, just as i wrote earlier, i thought the train was the lrt/mrt, because that's the only passenger train i've used. but in the dream it was dark, not night dark, but no lights dark. i thought that was strange, then i thought maybe it was the mrt, because one station is sort of underground. i also wrote that my body was not mine in the dream, it was a caucasian female body. in the dream the doors were blasted off, but also was the floor i was standing on right in front of the door. after the blast in the dream i don't remember anything, just that i woke up with bandages around my leg and feet. then i was looking for my burberry bag, which in reality i don't own, not one burberry item. i've always associated burberry with london. the dream woke me up with cold sweat and shaking stiffly. it was so real, even the pain.

was it just coincidence? or a dream with coded message? or just too much watching cable news? i know i've always had the feeling of de javu, since i was young. but if this is a premonition, this would be the first time. but i'm hoping its not, cause that would make me crazy other wise.

2005-06-30T21:08:00.000+08:00

a month gone by without any blog posts from me. sigh.

well i've been busy since my mother came home. also i've been busy since she left.

as of now i'm mothering my five-year old sister. that means i'm her yaya and driver (i pick her up from school) while my mom is away. and its not easy. but challenging none the less, and i found new respect for mothers.

i've also been wondering this past week, what would happen to our government, to our country. this changing of presidents and all politics is not doing our country any good. why can't other filipinos be satisfied with what we have. sometimes i wonder if we all truly understand the meaning of democracy. its not just about doing pro or against rallies, but also giving respect as to what the consesus of the majority. these issues are just adding to the uncertainties that the country is experiencing. instead of arguing whether its legal to have the wiretap tape be played, we should all be pouring our energy and resources into finding solutions to our economic and social problems.

2005-05-30T11:48:00.000+08:00

a big lizard! this one was taken from philippine eagle conservation foundation in davao city. the foundation not only takes care of endangered philippine eagles, they also cater to the needs of other animals as well, like this lizard (i forgot the name of this lizard). they also have alligators, bats, and other species of birds that are believed to be endangered.

posted by hL

obedience

2005-05-26T14:26:00.000+08:00

i don't remember where i got this, but i'd like to share it.
simple definition of:

fearful obedience - obedience out of fear, fear of unwanted consequences

loving obedience - out of love and respect to somebody or something is the
reason behind the obedient behavior

ingles, english

2005-05-26T14:10:00.000+08:00

I developed a taste for watching sesame street. i didn't watch the children's show when i was a kid, except when my sister was in control of the tv. there was a filipino version titled 'batibot', i never watched it regularly except, again, with my sister. but now, having another much younger sister, i watch the show with her almost everyday. the public tv show is educational, i thought that hey i might learn something new. well i did learn a lot. especially for my english.

huli na ba ang lahat para matuto ako ng tamang ingles? masisi mo ba ako kung wala akong natutunan sa english teacher ko nung elementary ako?

naalala ko yung isang teacher ko ang pinagawa lang sa amin ay isaulo ang tulang 'the creation.' mamatay-matay ako pagkabisado ng tulang yun! at muntikan pang bumagsak sa english!

eto natutunan ko sa ingles noon, hindi sapat ang pagkabisado ng tula upang matuto magsalita ng ingles; ang dating eh makikipag-usap ka sa mga inglisero na ang sinasabi mo lang ya ang mga linya ng tulang 'the creation'? ganito ang magiging takbo ng usapan:

"how are you?" tanong ng kausap mong inglisero.
at ang sagot mo ay,
"at the beginning, there was darkness"

hay dios ko! hindi kayo magkakaintindihan! tama ba na ipakabisado sa estudyante ang tulang 'the creation' para matuto sila ng ingles? sabagay naging matalas naman sa pagsasaulo yung mga estudyante! ha!

Note: i wrote this like almost a year ago, and just posted it now.

cheesiest line

2005-05-07T09:28:00.000+08:00

i was watching some tv, a korean telenovela, which seems to be a hit in this corner of the world, when i heard the cheesiest line ever spoken. the guy says: you are the oasis of my desert. goodness gracious, who writes these translations. i almost choked while drinking!

its my mother tongue, you mother packer

2005-04-28T03:59:00.000+08:00

i was standing in line waiting for my turn at the ATM. there's a woman in front of me with her son and another woman, a friend or realtive i think. from the conversation that i heard (i know i shouldn't eavesdrop, but somebody said that listening to other people's conversation is one way to improve writing dialogues), i deducted that the mother and son were living overseas possibly an english speaking country, maybe the US. the other woman asked the child if he could speak tagalog. the mother replied that he can't because ever since he was small they speak to him only in english. the reasoning behind was that the child would have difficulty adjusting to school since english is the main language used where they live.

i just thought that it was wrong, well first i raised a skeptical eye brow and thought 'you mother packer.' it is a known fact that children are very well adaptable especially in languages. the first six years of a child's life is the best years for a child to learn several languages. because these are the formative years and is when they learn very quickly. but of course as long as the child is exposed to several languages before their adolescence period, then the he or she will learn those languages very quickly.

i find it unfair to deprive a child of the opportunity to learn two or more languages. i think the mother's excuse, i will not consider it a valid reason, is unacceptable. i pity her for being a victim of a way of thinking, or shall i say a distinct part of the filipino culture, that if your child doesn't know how to speak english he or she is not intelligent enough. that's so sad, to think and imply that the filipino language is inferior to the english language. thus a lot of young people today are suffering with this mentality. most of all the filipino language is being stolen its opportunity to grow and evolve in a language that is purely filipino. well its purely filipino if one could consider its evolution as a result of a colonial mentality, that in itself is a very filipino characteristic, from which i still try to escape.

the culture of poverty

2005-04-26T04:43:00.000+08:00

why are the filipinos still poor?
after sixty years of independence, why are many filipinos still live in poverty?
why is our economy not improving over the years?
these are some question that has been bugging me. i wonder if there is an indepth study of why the philippines is still in poverty. i think there should be a study that would answer why are filipinos still poor and what can be done about it.

It's called self-preservation

2005-04-26T04:35:00.000+08:00

another euphemism for unrequited love. its what you do when you love someone but he or she is in love with another person.

there's this guy named carl. i've been in love with him for a long time. i don't know if he knows. well i think he doesn't know because he's in a relationship right now. also i don't talk to him. what do you say to someone like him without giving away your heart? so i just act cool, act as if i'm not turning into a puddle of goo when he looks at me and say 'hello.' although i'm civil enough with him, small conversations to cover that uncomfortable silence when you both find yourselves left alone in a confining space. being hostile also helps, show him what a bitch you can be and he wouldn't think that you like him too much. it worked for me, he thinks i don't like him because he's dating my closest friend. so there, that's the thing that makes me hold on tight to my dignity.

i know it may sound so cliche, but hey cliches are facts of life as i heard somebody say, but i digress. so it all started when...

Tudor History website

2005-04-07T15:02:00.000+08:00

i was searching about the six wives of henry viii on line, when lo and behold i came across this website tudorhistory.org. as a big fan (and, with most humility, an amateur historian) of the family where elizabeth I came from, this is a very interesting discovery. so i'm sharing this info for those who consider themselves anglophile or who are fan of the tudor family.

ever since i started school, history has been a favorite subject of mine. and that fascination with history never waned as the years go by. when i took world history in high school, i even got more curious about it. that was the start of my curiosity about the kings and queens that reigned europe. theirs was a history that is quite interesting, laced with politics, intrigue, deceit, violence, and even romantic love. and the history of england's kings and queens are no exemption from these. that's why i was drawn to the history of henry viii and how he has changed the history of england, and subsequently the world. the history of the tudors is a witness to a century that was the dawn of renessaince in europe. its always an interest to me those times when one man or woman was able to leave a remarkable impact or change in history.

Pope John Paul II 1920-2005 Pontifex Maximus et Servus servorum Dei

2005-04-03T14:34:00.000+08:00

i woke up to a sunday that is shrouded with sadness. news of the death of his holiness pope john paul II just broke early in the morning here in the philippines. i was saddened and shocked even though i've been expecting the announcement of his death anytime. he's the only pope i've known all my life, and his going home to GOD made me feel like loosing someone close to me. but i've also felt some kind of relief that his suffering has ended, and that even in death he chose to die in dignity just as he has lived his life. i am glad that he is with GOD whom he has served all his life.

karugtong nung katangahan ng isang bus driver

2005-03-26T09:09:00.000+08:00

eto na yung isa pang hirit nung tangang bus driver.

nung matapos yung kanyang litanya hinggil sa utos ng dios na 'huwag makiapid sa asawa ng may asawa' eh humirit pa ng isa si tangang bus driver. siya daw sinasabihan niya yung asawa niya na magtiwala sa kanya. huwag daw magsususpetsya o maniniwala sa mga tsismis na may babae siya. huwag daw siyang magseselos o magsalita ng mga bagay na hindi naman siya sigurado kung totoo. kasi daw pag ginawa daw yun ng kanyang misis, gagawin daw niyang totoo ang lahat ng bintang ni misis.

grabe! sobrang nag-init ang ulo ko talaga sa kanya. tulad nung sinasabi niyang paliwanag sa utos ng dios, kanya na namang pinapahiwatig na ang babae ang may kasalanan kung bakit nangangaliwa si mister. nangangahulugan na ipanasa niya sa kanyang asawa ang responsibilidad ng pagiging tapat niya sa asawa. at syempre nangangahulugan din na may tiwala din siya kay misis na hindi niya magagawa na tumingin sa ibang lalaki. at sa oras na magawa nga ni misis na makiapid sa ibang lalaki, eh kasalanan ni misis pa rin. isang maliwanag na halimbawa ng double standard sa mga babae.

kakaiba talaga yung bus driver na yun. gusto kong sabihin sa kanya na grabe siya maghugas ng kanyang kasalanan, kung siya ay magkakasala man. pati salita ng dios papaikutin masabi lang na hindi siya nagkakasala sa kanyang mga ginawa o gagawin.

kaya ang mga babae dapat magingat sa mga lalaking nakikilala. kilatisin mabuti ang kanilang mga paguugali. mahirap maipit sa ganung sitwasyon, kailangan paairilin ang pagiisip at marunong lumaban. sana huwag natin kalimutan na kaya natin ipaglaban ang ating karapatan at kalayaan sa mundong dominado ng mga lalaki. kung ano mang kalayaan at karapatan na ating tinatamasa ngayon ay dahil sa ipinaglaban ito ng mga naaping babae noon, huwag sana natin itong kalimutan.

just for laughs

2005-03-23T13:56:00.000+08:00

Q)What do men have in common with tiles?
A)If you lay them right the first time you can walk all over them for
the rest of your life.

My train bombing dream

2005-03-19T20:36:00.000+08:00

i had a strange dream the other night. it seemed so real.

i was in a commuter train, i thought it was the LRT because of some similarities. i was standing near the door, when somebody shouted there's a bomb near the door. so i quickly moved away from the door. then it happened, there was a loud bang, and the door of the train was blasted off. then next thing i know i was sitting down with my back on a post. there were people around, some were crying for help and some were in pain. then i felt something painful in my body. i looked down, and my toes were wrapped in a gauze, then half of my right leg were covered with gauze also. i tried standing up and walking but it was painful.

when i felt the pain in my dream, that's when i noticed that i'm in a lucid dream. so in my dream i stood up then looked for an exit. i found a staircase going down. i tried going down the stairs, but my leg hurts so bad. then i noticed i don't have my bag with me. so i started asking around if somebody saw my bag. it is a burberry tote bag; that was the image of the bag in my mind. then i started thinking about whats inside it. like my wallet, credit cards, atm cards, license, etc. that's when i become fully conscious.

it all seem so real. especially the blasting of the bomb. i got really scared at that point, and thought now i know what its like to be caught in a bombing. the confusion, the fear, and the physical pain. but the disturbing thing about it was that i look different. its like my body belong to somebody else. it just made me wonder, and spooked.

i think i'm going to avoid trains, for now.

How I got my scully-style-bob-cut

2005-03-17T00:07:00.000+08:00

I got crazy a week ago, so I had my hair cut. No.

my hair was midway my back already when I decided to have it cut. I had a bad case of split-ends and a very dry hair. Its the result of the straightening I had a year ago. I wasn't able to take care of it the way a straightened hair should be.

the hair stylist told me that if you had your hair straightened, relaxed, rebonded or even dyed, the best way to take care of it is to shampoo at least twice a week and always use conditioner. You should also have it treated with hot oil regularly. This way your hair won't dry and split on ends.

of course lazy me didn't do that. So I suffered the indignity of having split ends and hair gone crazy everyday. That's why I finally decided to have it cut short. I asked the hair stylist to cut it with the same style the lady on one of the salon's posters. Its sort of a layered bob cut.

I was satisfied with the result. It is the same cut as the woman on the poster. Except that when I got out of the salon I have this silly grin on my face, and I'm a bit giddy inside. I look like a sixth grader. The hair style made me look so young, very young. My brother even told me it was ugly, that I look stupid. I just laughed at him. Thank god it was just that first day, when I washed my hair and blow dried it, the result was even better, I got the scully-style-bob-cut. My friend told me it looks good on me. And I like it.

Up Here

2005-03-06T13:02:00.000+08:00

Up here is where i come up
everyday, up here i dream away,
wondering about life,
about love, about the sea.
From way up here the sea
seems to be strange and familiar
up here the wind may be cold
but it is invited, wanted.
Clouds could be reached from up here
passing through my fingers
like dreams flowing from my
unconscous mind.
Up here i don't have to open my eyes
to see the beauty, where i can
escape the horror of the world
below my mind.

2005-03-01T19:28:00.000+08:00

Cheers to the birthday boy, Jojo!

posted by hL

2005-02-21T14:38:00.000+08:00

here again is a pix of my dogs. here i used the nikon coolpix 3200, its an automatic 3MP digital cam.

posted by hL

shattered glass of love

2005-02-09T22:07:00.000+08:00

i once loved a boy, a boy trapped in a man's body. i don't know how or why. i just felt it. i think i was so obsessed with the idea of what he can be, if he just grew up. i know denial is the river in egypt, but for a long time i did. then it just hit me, like lightning on sand creating solid glass. i knew it was love, a glass of love. its just not strong enough to let me believe in the possibility of him feeling the same way about me. although its highly probable that somehow he did like me. i just ignored it, or maybe he ignored it also. but i know that love is strong enough, whithin me, to let him go. there may be no closure, but i want to believe.

2005-02-08T02:38:00.001+08:00

test photo (micro focus)

posted by hL

2005-02-08T02:38:00.000+08:00

test photo (micro focus)

posted by hL

2005-02-08T02:37:00.000+08:00

kenny

posted by hL

2005-02-08T02:35:00.000+08:00

hershey

posted by hL

2005-02-08T02:34:00.000+08:00

test photo

posted by hL

2005-02-08T02:32:00.000+08:00

from alpha's wedding

posted by hL

2005-02-08T02:31:00.000+08:00

copy from alpha's wedding

posted by hL

departure area in ninoy aquino international airport

2005-02-08T01:16:00.000+08:00

nasubukan na ba ninyo na tumambay sa NAIA? ako ilang beses na kong nakatambay doon. hindi ko naman gawain tumambay doon. nagkakataon lang na kung may papadala ako sa magulang ko sa saudi arabia, eh dun ko na pinupuntahan yung paalis patungong saudi. eh nagkakataon na matagal ang paghihintay ko dun sa taong pagpapadalhan ko. ngunit may mga pagkakataon din naman na nakatambay din ako sa naia kapag inihahatid ko nanay ko sa kanilang pag-alis patungong saudi. ayun, hihintayin ko muna na maka-check-in sila bago ako umalis pauwi.

kakaiba pag tumambay sa naia. kung mahilig kang manood o mag-obserba ng mga tao, isa ang naia sa pinakamagandang lugar upang gawin ito. iba-ibang klase ng tao makikita dito. may mga puti tulad ng mga amerikano at mga taga-europa. may mga asiano, tulad ng mga chinese at hapon. at syempre ang mga pilipino, mula sa iba't ibang bahagi ng pilipinas, na papuntang ibang bansa.

nakakatuwa silang lahat na panoorin. lalo na ang mga pilipino na papuntang ibang bansa. kapag pinapanood mo silang mabuti, malalaman mo kung pang-ilang beses na silang nakakaalis sa pilipinas, at kung ang paglipad na iyon ay uang beses pa lamang para sa kanila. syempre hindi talaga mawawala na buong pamilya ang maghahatid sa isang pilipino na mangingibang bansa. kahit ano pang patakaran ang gawin ng naia, hindi maalis yun. makapamilya kasi ang kultura ng mga pilipino eh. at kung makakagawa ng paraan upang makapasok sa loob ng airport kahit hindi paalis, magagawan ng paraan. tulad ko, kaya ako nakakapasok sa loob kahit hindi naman ako aalis kasi may passport ako at ticket na pedeng ipakita sa guard. yun lang naman ang kailangan para makapasok ka. kaya yung mga kapamilya ng mga empleyado ng mga airlines eh nakakapasok pa rin.

marami ka ring drama na makikita kapag paalis ang isang pinoy. para ngang pelikula o palabas sa tv. andyan ang mga nag-iiyakan habang nagpapaalaman. may mga iba na pinipigilan pa ang pag-iyak, lalo na yung mga lalaki. andyan yung mga madamdaming mga yakapan at palitan ng halik. at syempre yung mga mata ng mga naiwan, hinahabol nila ng tingin ang mga mahal sa buhay habang papasok sa loob ng airport. kahit hindi na makita, hindi pa rin maialis ang tingin sa pintong pinasukan o kaya'y di maialis ang sarili sa kinakatayuan. para bang iyon na ang huling sulyap sa asawa, anak, kapatid o magulang na paalis.

tulad nga ng nasabi iba-ibang klase ng tao ang makikita sa naia. malalaman mo rin kung anong larangan o uri ng trabaho meron ang mga pinoy na papuntang ibang bansa. syempre ang nangunguna sa naia eh yung mga japayuki, na madalas, sa aking obserbasyon, ay kasama pa ang hapon na kasintahan o asawa sa paglipad patunong japan. hindi naman sa naii-stereotype ko sila, pero kung alam mo ang ginagawa ng karamihan ng mga pinay sa japan eh malalaman mo kagad sa tingin pa lang. malalaman mo rin kung ang isang pinoy na paalis eh nagbalikbayan sandali dito sa pinas. may mga ilan sa kanila alam mo na pinoy na pinoy talaga. mapapansin mo rin sa ilan na masaya o nagpapasalamat na hindi sila nagtatagal sa pilipinas, mas pinipili nila ang bansa na dayuhan. at syempre sa bawat pinoy na paalis, di talaga maaalis ang pagdadala ng isang malaking kahon, minsan hindi lang isa, isang katutak pa!

yun ang kakaiba sa mga pilipinong bumibyahe. yung mga dayuhan mapapansin mo ang mga dala eh isang maleta o kaya'y dalawa. pero walang kahon kang makikita na tulaktulak. at syempre, dahil magulang ko ay madalas bumiyahe, eh may ideya ako kunga no ang laman ng mga kahon na iyon. napapangiti na nga lang ako pag nakakakita ako ng ganun.

2005-02-08T01:08:00.000+08:00

i just realized something about the iraq war. i was watching bbc this morning and one of the headlines was about the reply of iran regarding america's policy towards them. and the chief iranian negotiator said that if america attacks iran, they would retaliate. that iran is quite capable, and the chief iranian negotiator said that american intelligence knows how capable iran is.
that's when it hit me. when america bombed iraq with shock and awe, they reasoned that iraq has weapons of mass destruction. that iraq is starting to pile or already has some wmd stocked somewhere. american intelligence said that these wmd's include nuclear and biological weapons. ofcourse now we all know that the said wmd's in iraq were nowhere to be found. now if iraq indeed have these said wmd's like american intelligence said, iraqis would have used these said wmd's to defend themselves. but they did not, and in my opinion, i think america knows this. how else could americans won the war in a very short time? a country that keeps such weapons should have been able to defend it self, but the iraqis weren't able to. it just shows that the american president mislead his people to war. and that they should be threading carefully with the iran issue. i believe that iran has nuclear capabilities in defending itself against offensive military actions by other countries. i just don't want another war, a war that most likely involve nuclear weapons.

first pics

2005-01-29T11:19:00.000+08:00

yesterday i got my first digital camera. i asked a friend to buy it for me in the US. its a canon power shot A95. below are the first pics that i took using it. well, actually these are more like the 3rd and the 4th. the first two was underexposed, because i was practicing with the manual exposure. i took a couple of photos of myself after taking the dogs' pics. but i won't post it here coz i look like crazy!

its a great digicam for first timers on digital photography. its so easy to use, gives the user more flexibility in takings photos. the lcd display is so clear, really beautiful. its smaller than other brands like kodak, but the resolution is very clear.

anyhow, i am so happy that finally i got the cam. now i can practice shooting anytime anywhere, now that the research project i'm working on is over!!! i so wanted for that project to end!!! i am so happy!!!

this is kenny, mix retriever-pitbull

posted by hL

2005-01-29T11:16:00.000+08:00

this is hershey, mix retriever

posted by hL

2005-01-20T02:20:00.000+08:00

i still have more about the fucking stupid bus driver. i'm just busy with project report editing. and i also plan to translate it into english.

in the meantime, there's this world-wide poll that BBC did regarding whether the world is less dangerous since bush reelection. i just don't understand how the philippines was among the three nations that think the world is safer?

mga pagkakamali ng isang bus driver

2005-01-18T18:09:00.000+08:00

nung sumakay ako ng bus kaninang umaga, umupo ako sa harapan malapit sa driver. kakaiba tong driver nung bus, napakadaldal at may pagkatanga na siya namang kinainisan ko.

kahit puno na yung bus nagpasakay pa rin yung driver, may babaeng sumakay. umupo yung babae dun sa harap na harap ng bus kasi wala nang upuan sa bus at mukhang kakilala nung bus driver yung babae. di ko alam kung anong simula nung usapan nila nung babaeng umopo dun sa malapit sa tabi niya. humirit yung bus driver na nasasabi daw sa bibiliya na isa sa mga sampung utos ng dios ay ang "huwag makiapid sa asawa ng may asawa." iyan ang kanyang eksaktong mga salita.

nagbigay siya ng kunwaring sitwasyon, kung halimbawa daw makita nung babae yung kanyang asawa naglalakad tapos may kaholding-hands na babae, maakusahan mo ba kaagad ng pakikiapid sa may asawa yung lalake, at kung pagbbabatayan ang bibliya eh kasalanan daw ba iyon. at siyempre sabi nung babae, oo kasalanan yun.

ang kanyang sagot naman eh, anong matibay na ebidensya, magkahawak kamay lamang daw sila at kung malaman niya na dalaga yung babae, eh hindi daw kasalana yun. kasi nga daw sa ten commandments eh ang sinasabi eh "huwag makiapid sa asawa ng may asawa." eh dalaga naman yung babae, ibig sabihin, ayon sa kanyang paliwanag, eh hindi daw kasalanan yun. at hindi din daw makakasuhan yung asawang lalaki ng adultery kasi nga naman di naman nahuli na nakikipagtalik. dahil sa batas kailangan matibay na ebidensya tulad ng pagkahuli sa aktwal na akto ng pagtatalik.

ang sagot ng babae sa paliwanag nung bus driver ay mali pa rin ang ginawa nung asawang lalake, kasalanan pa rin yun. sa puntong ito pinipilit ng bus driver na dalaga nga yung babaeng nahuling kasama ni mister, ibig sabihin walang kasalanan ang lalaki. kung baga pinapalabas niya na ang batas ng dios ay pabor sa mga lalaki at sa isang punto ay mali rin. bakit nga naman magbibigay ng ganoong kautusan ang dios na masyadong specific, at may butas pa rin para sa mga lalaki. para na rin niyang sinabi na ang dios ay talagang lalaki, sapagkat bias ang kanyang batas sa mga lalaki.

sa mga pananalitang ito ng bus driver napapansin ko na gusto niyang manggaling sa babae ang sagot. pinilit niya na hindi kailangan bigyan ng kung ano man pakahulugan pa ang kautusan na iyon, at dapat intindihan lamang ayon sa pagkakasulat. at pinagbigyan naman siya ng babae. sinabi ng babae na eh di kasalanan nung dalaga, kasi siya yung nakikiapid sa asawa ng may asawa. pero kahit nabigay niya ang gustong sagot nung bus driver, dinidiin pa rin niya na may kasalanan pa rin ang lalaki.

dito na nag-init ang aking ulo. sobrang daming sagot ang gusto kong sabihin sa kanya hinggil sa kanyang paliwanag sa kautusan ng dios na hindi pakikiapid. at isa lamang ang aking naiisip tungkol sa kanya, siya ay isang dakilang tanga. tulad ng mga lalaki na nauna sa kanya, at mga lalaki sa panahon ngayon, tanga!

lahat ng kanyang sinabi ay pawang mga katangahan at walang katotohanan. unang-una, hindi po nakalagay sa bibiliya ang mga salitang "huwag makiapid sa asawa ng may asawa." hindi ko alam kung saang bibiliya niya kinuha iyon, pero sa bibliya na ginagamit ng mga katoliko ang nakasaad sa ingles ay "thou shall not commit adultery." kung isasalin ito sa Pilipino, "huwag kang makiapid sa hindi mo asawa." sa pilipino ang pakikiapid ay nangangahulugan na pakikipagtalik sa ibang tao bukod sa asawa. kung susuriin mabuti ang pakikiapid ay ang pakikipagtalik lamang. ngayon kung ito ay dudugsungan tulad ng "pakikiapid sa di mo asawa," ito na iyong sa ingles ay "adultery."

kaya lamang nagiging iba ang kahulugan ng pakikiapid o makiapid ay sapagkat ating na-aassociate ito sa salitang "adultery" na kung iasasalin sa pilipino ng literal ay "pakikiapid sa di mo asawa." sumakatuwid ang kautusan ng dios na "thou shall not commit adultery" kung isasalin sa pilipino ay "huwag kang makiapid sa di mo asawa." sagayon ang sinasabi niya o ang kanyang pinakakahulugan na ang babaeng dalaga ang may kasalanan sapagkat siya ay nakikiapid sa asawa ng may asawa ay pawang mali. kung susuriin mabuti ang lumalabas na mas may kasalanan ay ang lalaki, sapagkat siya ay nakikiapid o nakikipagtalik sa hindi niya asawa kahit siya ay kasal na at may asawa pa.

pangalawang punto, dalawang kautusan ng dios ang napapatungkol sa mag-asawa, una na nga iyong "thou shall not commit adultery." ang sumunod ay kasama sa ikasampung utos ng dios, ang "thou shall not covet thy neighbors goods and thou shall not covet thy neighbors wife." isalin natin sa pilipino, huwag mong pagnasaan ang mga bagay na pag-aari ng iyong kapit-bahay at huwag pagnasaan ang asawang babae ng iyong kapit-bahay.

kailangan pa bang ipaliwanag ito ng mabuti? ang pinag-kaiba ng pagnanasa at pakikiapid sa di asawa ay ang pagnanasa nasa isip pa lamang. samantalang ang pangalawa ay may aksyon na kasama o nagawa na. kung susuriin din itong kautusan na ito lalaki pa rin ang lumalabas na nagkakasala, kasi sa ingles sinasabi na "thy neighbors wife" na sa pilipino ay ang "asawang babae ng iyong kapitbahay." buti pa nga sa pilipino kung isasalin talaga siya ay hindi specific sa kung sa esposa o esposo, sa pilipinong translasyon ito ay "huwag pagnasaan ang asawa ng iba." ibig sabihin sa pilipino base sa wika, ang parehong asawa ay tinutukoy ng kautusan.

hindi ko alam kung ano talaga ang gustong palabasin ng bus driver mula sa kanyang pinagsasabi. ang alam ko lang ay mali ang kanyang mga sinabi at walang basehan. mabuti pa ay basahin niyang muli ang bibliya at magsimba pa siya tuwing linggo. o kaya mabuti pa ay ayusin na lang niya ang kanyang pagmamaneho ng bus.

2005-01-17T19:38:00.000+08:00

Enchanted Kingdom trip
Posted by Hello

this is an old photo taken in 2003 using a nokia 7650

2005-01-17T19:36:00.000+08:00

LIDER RAs with Dr. Allan B.I. Bernardo

Posted by Hello

silent new year

2005-01-11T17:18:00.000+08:00

since dec. 26th i find it hard to write about anything, not even my sadness about the catastrophic event that day. its just no words could truly express the effect the tsunami tragedy has on me. and i'm not even in one of the countries affected, but we are so close and it has happened here a long time ago. i am just thankful that my friend working in the maldives is alright. this is just one of those moments when you can't think of anything but feel everything. i didn't even think about celebrating new year with a bang, but greet 2005 with silence to honour the thousands of lives that has gone at the dawn of the new year.

Census Journey

2004-12-27T18:36:00.000+08:00

along the length of edsa
one big snake makes it way,
dilapidated business buildings
and mega structures of malls
for the rich and wannabees,
lined up the coast of a
very turbulent and often
violent sea beyond the city,
with every meter you see
alternately the difference
between having lots of money
and not having a shoe,
between cleaned srubbed faces
and faces of the hungry,
behind and in front
the lung destroyer surges,
underneath and upstairs
brains blowing up with
lucid dreams of the drugged,
a glimmer of hope in cubao
the colosseum and its giant tree
beyond its parking lot of
littered cars and people.

merry christmas?

2004-12-26T01:01:00.000+08:00

Christmas this year was uneventfull. But with unfortunate events that happened around the world prior to Christmas day, it was a given. It is sad to think that we celebrate the birth of Christ, but mankind is still yet to be at peace with each other or with himself. Makes you wonder...

2004-12-20T19:26:00.000+08:00

FPJ is a great loss to the entertainment industry in the Philippines. And no matter what they say about him, i believe that he is a good man, greater than those who are leading this country.

i can't believe a priest would say and insinuate in national tv that 'da king' doesn't deserve that attention given to him upon his death. that there are better worthy and real poeple, i.e. the priest that was buried with a heroes burial in mindanao. does he even know FPJ personally to say such things? when in fact, based on what he said, he only knew him through his profession as an actor. who is he to judge a person and label them as he pleases? aren't we all equal in the eyes of GOD? as i was thought by nuns and priest it is what good deed we had done, is how HE would judge us. does he know anything about the good deeds that 'da king' has done or has not done? i'm not being righteous or anything, i just can't believe such pries, a bishop i think, would be so tactless. well he is only human, i ought to forgive him for that, but still some respect for him has been lost.

What Planet Am I From

2004-12-14T02:19:00.000+08:00

This is quite true about me, dreamy and mystical. But I never did try to find out anything about psychic abilities, I never believed myself to have one.

But there are things that had happened before that sometimes rattle that belief. Like when Sept 11th happened. I remember waking that Tuesday morning exactly the same time the first plane hit one of the towers. And fom where I live, we're 12 hours ahead of New York time.

I was so sleepy I didn't even know why I woke up at that time. The first thing that came to mind was look at the clock and what the date was. And then when my mind supplied the date, which is the 11th, I had this thought, more like broken words actually, that was just weird, it sort of just passed through my mind. The words were: this day mark calendar history. I didn't know what it was all about. After that I felt kinda weird and then went back to sleep.

Then that night we were watching TV when there was a breaking news. And I looked at the time and then I remembered how I woke up that morning. Its kinds spooky to think about. I didn't tell it to anybody at first, coz it might just be a coincidence or nothing. But I never did forget it though.

You Are From Neptune

You are dreamy and mystical, with a natural psychic ability.
You love music, poetry, dance, and (most of all) the open sea.
Your soul is filled with possibilities, and your heart overflows with compassion.
You can be in a room full of friendly people and feel all alone.
If you don't get carried away with one idea, your spiritual nature will see you through anything.

What Planet Are You From?